Paint Water

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By: scribbleface

As soon as Andi walked through the door of the Spoon, Amber felt her stomach churn. All that time preparing a speech going to waste, the words dying on her lips as she merely stared at girl in front of her, her mouth going dry.

"Amber? Are you okay?" Andi's voice was gentle and it calmed Amber down slightly. Andi wouldn't hate her. Andi was one of her best friends. It would be okay. She reassured herself, biting her lip. She was brought back to the time she knocked a cup of paint water onto one of Andi's finished projects, perpetually ruining it. Andi didn't get angry. She didn't yell or frown, no. She merely shot Amber a small smile and started a new one, reassuring the blonde girl that it was okay.

But this wasn't as simple as paint water. They couldn't just pretend nothing happened and start anew. Not with this.

"Yeah, don't worry bambi." Amber forced a smile, inhaling deeply as Andi sat across from her. She only had thirty minutes before she had to go back to work, a rule she would've never followed until now. "I just wanted to tell you something because.. you're important to me." Amber admitted, taking Andi's hands in her own.

"What is it?" Andi asked, giving Amber's hands a soft squeeze.

"Do you remember that day at the rage cage, when I told you I was in love with Jonah?" Andi merely nodded, encouraging the girl to continue. "Well, I think I lied." Amber felt nauseous. She couldn't do this. She couldn't bear to lose someone like Andi, not when she could count all her true friends on one hand.

Andi looked confused now but stayed silent, afraid that if she said anything, Amber would immediately back out of whatever she was trying to say.

"I mean, I think I have feelings for someone but it isn't Jonah." Amber admitted. "In fact, it isn't a boy at all." Her voice broke and she couldn't help the tears that welled in her eyes. "I'm sorry," She said hurriedly. "I didn't think it would be this hard." She let out a watery giggle, wiping at her eyes with her sweater sleeves.

"Amber," Andi began, taking the other girl's hands in her own. "I'm so proud of you for telling me. I hope you know I still love you and I would never think badly of you over something like this." She said, her eyes shining with genuine admiration. "Okay, okay, keep going." She grinned, rubbing her thumbs along the back of Amber's hand in an attempt to comfort her.

"I knew for awhile that I liked girls." She began, her voice laced with hesitance. "I just thought that if I occupied myself with a boyfriend, my feelings for girls would go away." A sad smile graced her lips before she whispered, "They never did."

"I love Jonah, right? But it's not romantic at all." Amber sighed. "I kept trying to convince myself that it was but when I kissed him I felt nothing. No spark, no butterflies; I felt empty." She mumbled, picking at a loose thread on her sleeve. "This is basically just a long winded explanation about how I was projecting my feelings for you onto Jonah." She rushed out, her eyes wide. It was like the whole world slowed, her eyes fixed on Andi as she watched the other girl react.

Andi's expression shifted from confusion, to surprise, and finally to something Amber never thought she would see in this situation: giddiness. "You like me?" Andi asked softly, squeezing Amber's hands once more.

"Uh, yes?" Amber gave her a shaky smile, looking down at their hands. "You're so sweet and bright... How could I not like you?" Her tone was hushed, and she felt as if it was just her and Andi, in their own little world. "But I get that you don't feel the same. I mean, you're such a good person and I'm just.. Amber Kippen: a jerk." She sighed, her eyes trained on the table. To Amber, it was a miracle that Andi was her friend. How could Andi even think about Amber like that after everything she did before. The bracelet, the ferris wheel, the whole Jonah thing in general. She was such a mess, all because of a stupid boy she didn't even want to date. (No offense to Jonah, of course.)

Andi didn't let go of her hands. "Amber is that really how you see yourself?" Her brows were knitted together out of concern. "Sure, you were.. a bit of a jerk before but we're okay now. We're good friends." Andi smiled, freeing one of her hands so she could reach across the table and coax Amber into looking back up. "Maybe -I mean, if you want- maybe, we could be more than good friends." Andi shrugged, trying to hide how nervous she truly was.

A beat of silence passed as Amber pulled her hands away. Was that the wrong thing to say, Andi wondered. Her thoughts were quickly put to rest as she was gently dragged out of the booth, feeling Amber's arms wrap around her. She immediately hugged the girl back, her heart soaring at the simple token of affection.

Amber shot Andi an apologetic smile, glancing over at the vacant counter as she pulled away. "I should probably get back to work but uh, maybe we can hang out after my shift?" She asked hopefully.

"Oh, sure!" Andi grinned, heading towards the door. She stopped in her tracks, turning to face Amber once more. "It's a date." She added with a soft giggle before practically skipping out of the Spoon.

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