because of you

part thirteen- "apologies"

"'Cause you brought out the best of me
A part of me I'd never seen
You took my soul wiped it clean
Our love was made for movie screens"
- All i want
         Kodaline

JOHNNYS POV
"kenzie!" i scream and run over to her

i shake her and she opens her eyes slowly coming back to reality.

"leave me alone." she murmurs holding her arms blood seeping through her fingers

"no kenzie i am not leaving you ok? i'm going to stay with you for the rest of the night. there's no way i'm letting you be alone right now." i whisper trying to stroke her hair. she seats my hand away and wrinkles her eyebrows

"i said leave me the fuck alone johnny. just get away from me." she whispers in between sobs

"please just let me stay here with you." i plead my voice cracking

"no. get out." she yells in my face, infuriated.

a tear rolls down her face and i can feel my own eyes start to water.

"ple-" i began to say but my mind stops me. i know if i say one more word i will start crying. kenzie doesn't deserve that. after everything i did to her the last thing i can do is sit here and cry like she did something wrong. she didn't. she never does.

after a few moments of silence i stand up and start to head for the door when something stops me. i turn around and start rummaging through all her cabinets and drawers.

"johnny what are you doing please just leave." kenzie whispers from the floor.

"no you obviously got that needle from somewhere and there's no way in hell I'm leaving until i find them all." i say sternly. she shakes her head then closes her eyes again, obviously too weak to fight back.

after searching for a solid 30 minutes, i finally found four other needles all around her room and bathroom.

why does she have them? did she think she was gonna need them? did something happen? a million thoughts rush to my head as i stare in horror at the objects in my hands.

as i begin to walk out of the room i hear a small voice behind me.

"under the bed" i hear kenzie say as she points below her bead frame

i kneel down to find yet another needle hidden in her room.

"this all?" i ask and she nods then looks away

"i'm sorry." i say to kenzie as she sits there, ignoring me

"i really rea-" i begin but she stops me "stop johnny get out." she says before i can finish what i'm going to say.

slowly i make my way back to my room thinking about what i can do to make it up to kenzie.

a weight takes over my heart and i begin to feel so ashamed, even though she didn't understand the circumstances, i ruined everything.

sofie speaks
hey guys sorry i haven't updated
in a while
i will try to do better <3

pls vote and comment to give me validation hehe  🤚🏽