Dusk: A Handmaid's Tale Story

Chapter 6

Serenity's POV:

I had gotten my period. 

Mrs. Adams shed some tears as I reported to Aunt Lydia the news after the first ceremony. Aunt Lydia sat next to me on the ornate couch while she handed tissues to the Commander's wife, consoling her. I sat there numbly listening to all going around me. Aunt Lydia was encouraging Mrs. Adams to have faith and to pray harder to God to bring forth her child. Me? I was thanking God that He hadn't listened. I had never been happier to have cramps and nausea in my life. 

The days following the first ceremony had been awkward and strange especially considering my first ceremony nearly killed me. I couldn't forget having hemorrhaged from the act and falling unconscious. Thankfully true to their word, Ezra and Lena hadn't told anyone what happened that night. I had woken up the next day in bed as if nothing had happened. Lena had checked in on my health several times, but I had not seen Ezra since his act of kindness... 

I was beginning to find myself looking for him around the home. His yellow door stayed closed however and his teasing tone didn't bounce off the walls. It was like he had vanished. 

"Lena? W-Where's Ezra been?" I asked quietly as I helped her wash some of the dishes that had been used during Aunt Lydia's visit. 

The older woman briefly paused her washing to look at me sideways. 

Looking around to ensure no one else was around, she looked back at me with a sigh. 

"Mr. Adams is away with some of the other Commander's sons. Some sort of conference or meeting? He had no choice." She said, using more soap on the rag she was using. 

My eyebrows furrowed. I tried to picture Ezra, the Ezra that was such a mystery, surrounded by several dozen other young men dressed in fancy suits and drinking fancy wines as they chatted about crushing the rebels. I could picture him just on the outskirts of the crowd observing and yet not deeply engaging, doing just enough to not raise suspicion. Where Ezra stood in regards to Gilead's ideals, I had no full understanding but based off of his slipped comments I could see he had reservations; dare I say he had disagreements. 

Lena noticed my face lost in thought and paused again. "You best be careful girl. That's a Commander's son; don't you go forgetting that." 

I was taken aback by her tone. She seemed annoyed, but also protective over Ezra. But her words played in my mind. Of course I knew who he was: a Commander's son. Regardless of any personal opinions he may have, he was as bound to his role as I was to mine for the time being. To get close to him in anyway further was a hazard and a danger for us both. There were no real friends in Gilead...

"Trust me, I couldn't even if I tried." I said back, drying the last few dishes and departing. 

Later that afternoon after dinner, I heard the loud slam of a door. Making my way cautiously to the hallway I heard the hushed yet angry tones of two people. 

"Have you no self-control Ezra?! What had happened if one of the other sons thought you weren't joking? Then what? Is your loose tongue really worth losing a hand for? Or your life?!" 

"You know damn well none of this was my choice. I shouldn't have to watch every single thing I say. This world you and your buddies created was not my choice and yet you expect me to play this role to impress your friends?? Have you ever once asked me what I've wanted in my life?! You haven't ever! Ever since mom-"

"Don't you DARE bring up your mother. Ever. Listen here Ezra, you are MY son. As my son and the son of a Commander of Gilead you WILL obey me is that understood? I have no issue demonstrating the justice system to it's fullest... even against my own son." 

"I've never been your son." 

The sound of flesh smacking against flesh was heard and I flinched from behind the wall I was hiding in. 

"Go to your room. Pray that God has mercy on you for your disobedience." The Commander said harshly before stomping off. 

Another set of footsteps made their way toward me and I pressed myself against the wall, hoping not to be noticed. Ezra stepped into the kitchen area, wetting a rag and placing it on his face. He was hunched over the sink, dress shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 

"Hey..." I said hesitantly. 

He turned around quickly, before realizing it was me. 

"Serenity. I didn't know you would still be down." He said gently dabbing his face. 

In the light, I could see that his father's hit had begun to bruise his face and his lip was threatening to split a bit on the side. The Commander had raised his hand quite hard against his very own son... Stepping closer I motioned for him to pass me the rag. He looked at me curiously until he passed the wet fabric to me. I moved to wet it with cooler water and began to lightly press it against his top lip. He winced. 

"I'm sorry this happened to you." I said lightly dabbing away a bit of blood. 

His bright blue eyes looked down at me cautiously before he shrugged, "Could be worst honestly." 

I looked at him curiously before he continued. "Let's just say he's done worst..." He trailed off. 

The Commander had skeletons in his closet it seemed. 

I hadn't realized my hand had been trembling with anger until I felt Ezra grasp it. My large eyes looked up to meet his. 

"Hey, it's alright. He's a dick, but I can handle it." He said. His aqua eyes were intense and examining mine carefully. 

"You shouldn't have to." I said through my teeth. 

"You're right. But this is Gilead. We all have to survive somehow..." He trailed off, eyes appearing to glaze over a bit. 

I finished up and set the rag in the sink, Ezra still standing where he had been. His jaw was turning a darker shade slowly and it stood out in sharp contrast to his pale skin. The seemingly put together Commander had hit his own son... What else had he done? Had he hit his wife? Lena? Other Handmaids? Gilead had taught me not trust most people and that appearances can be deceiving, but it's cruelty never seemed to surprise me. It was just a good-looking facade and nothing more. Underneath the surface of Gilead was the reality: it was a cruel, dark place. A cruel place that threatened to darken any light within it. 

"We have to survive..." I trailed off. 

*Note: Hey guys! Thank you for all the love and support for this story! I apologize for the late update as I have been dealing with health issues. I will be doing my best to update and get this story moving. Thanks again for the support. <3