From the Devil's side

Chapter Nine- A crack in the mask

I stared blankly out at the still water which glistened in the April sun. Everything was so still, so quiet since almost everybody had left for the Easter holidays and yet... my mind was exploding. I reached down picking up some pebbles that lay by the waters edge. I turned one over in my hand before throwing it into the water enjoying watching the disturbance I could caused. Nothing deserved peacefulness or content. I slammed another few stones into the glass like water watching as the ripples cascaded widely over the surface. How one small act could cause a pattern of further consequences... 
The thoughts were broken as I heard my name called from further down the lake, carried along on the light breeze. I instinctively turned my head in the direction of the voice and saw her standing there. She did not wear her uniform as her usually saw her but instead wore a light blue and white dress which sat off her shoulders and reached down to her ankles... it was then that I realised she wasn't wearing any shoes... I frowned who walked the grounds in bare feet? I then realised how ridiculous my train of thought was and that what she was wearing was of very little importance. She began waving at me enthusiastically. I did not have the strength to deal with her today or anybody for that matter. I turned my head away from her and began to walk in the other direction into the first few trees of the forest. Surely she would take the hint and leave, besides she was barefooted she would not enter the woods without shoes on her feet. 
"Hey! Good afternoon to you to Tom, lovely to see you to,". I stopped taking in a deep breath. I was constantly proven wrong by this girl and her irritating persistence. 
"I did not expect to find company down here." I sighed not bothering to turn to face her.
"Sorry to disappoint you," she chuckled. I bit down on my lip and turned around only half way so that I was now facing the black lake again but I could see her silhouette in my peripheral. I couldn't bring myself to face her. Not today. Not now. Why did she have to show up now?
"What's wrong?"  she asked hesitantly. I clenched my jaw, I had to remove myself from her. I turned sharply, walking further into the forest. I swore as I heard her following me.
"Tom," she said again. I stopped walking but still did not force myself to face her. She was walking a dangerous path...
"Look at me," she whispered,  I felt her draw closer to me making my whole body tense. I turned around slowly focusing on a leaf upon the ground. I would be expelled if I lost my temper on her... I resisted the urge of reaching for my wand which was sat within my trouser pocket. Control. She couldn't see that something was wrong.
"Tell me what's happened," she kept her voice at a whisper. I felt something inside of me snap I couldn't stop the words from coming no matter how much I gritted my teeth.
"I know who she is... was,"
"I don't understand, who, who is?" she asked tentatively.
"My mother," I spat. The words seemed foreign to me... why was I telling her this? Moments passed and she did not ask anymore questions. I walked over to a nearby tree inspecting its bark, trying to calm my thoughts. 
"She was a witch; she was a Gaunt, the decedent family line of Slytherin," I was more speaking to myself and yet I knew she was listening to me... I shouldn't be letting anyone know any of this and yet I couldn't stop myself from talking. 
"Well that's good isn't it?" she asked gently. I felt a heat rise into my chest. 
"Is it?" I spat quietly, turning to face her for the first time, I saw her face change to own of concern as she stared at me without even blinking. Her chest rising and falling heavily. 
"She is dead," I said bluntly. 
"Yes," she replied weakly, I almost laughed at her pathetic response though at least she did not try to give some speal about how people never truly die. Death was finel. Anyone who thought different was a fool. I paused the silence allowing my mind to wander... 
"She died. A disgrace to all wizard kind, my mother. She needn't have died like a filthy muggle and yet she chose to, so weak." I had never said any of this out loud before and something snapped, all the anger I felt towards her, towards my Father, towards that orphanage and every heathen in it.
"She had a choice and she chose to leave me to rot in that muggle hell," I shouted, my voice hoarse. All of my anger and resentment burst forth, my magic burning my chest. Uncontainable. 
I pulled back my fist and plunged it into the bark of the tree. I could not even feel any pain as magic exploded uncontrollably from me I dropped to my knees, exhausted. My chest felt heavy as I heaved for breath... I had not lost control of my anger and my magic like that since I was a child. I felt her kneel down in front of me, I did not have the strength or will to bother to tell her to go away and to leave me alone. 
"Tom," she whispered, "I don't know what happened at the orphanage, but I know it mustn't have been a pleasant childhood. I understand that your mother being a witch is making you question what her choices would have been, but you can't be certain it was her choice. You don't truly know the circumstances that led to her death," 
I kept my head bowed, how dare she even try to understand. How could she possibly understand. 
"We don't know who your father is or where your father is but we do have a magical name now. Gaunt, surely you have some living relatives, perhaps they can provide you the answers you desperately crave and deserve. But this," taking me by surprise she reached out taking a hold of my now blooded fist in her own gently. I tensed what was she doing!? I attempted to pull my hand away but she held on firmly. She was about to never leave this forest alive if she did not let go. 
"This isn't healthy, it isn't the answer. You are the Heir of Salazar Slytherin you are better than this, you can find them, I can help you find them," she said sternly.  For once I knew that she was right... I was the Heir of Slytherin, I was better than this but I did not see how she could possibly help me. She then reached into the pocket of her dress with her free hand and withdrew her wand. I narrowed my eyes as she pointed it at my fist before the cuts and bruises melted away. I small part of me was impressed by the silent magic...
I stood abruptly leaving her knelt alone upon the forest floor below me. I looked down at her... she knew too much. I had been foolish, reckless.
"I am not going to say anything," she said earnestly, panic in her eyes as she brought herself to stand. Did she expect me to believe her? I fingered my wand in my pocket.
"It is no one's business. There is no one here but us, you can trust me Tom," 
I locked eyes with her, her blue orbs sparkling inviting me into her mind this time. Taking the opportunity I allowed myself passage. She was not lying... she was truely going to keep this a secret... but why? fear? I withdraw myself from her mind. I had seen all I needed to see... for now. 
I thought for a moment before deciding my thirst for knowledge was greater than my pride in this moment... 
"How do you think you can help locate the Gaunts?" I asked. Calmness and control returned to me.
"My Father,"  she replied bluntly. Her Father? I resisted the urge to push her further... she seldom mentioned her own family. I did not know how her Father could possibly help but then I would give her the benefit of the doubt after all she had now peaked my curiosity.