Us? Us. [ Hyunlixଓ ]

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 1 : ᴀʟᴏɴᴇ

It was so chilly the moment the boy took his step out of his house, making his way towards his campus. It was autumn after all, saying that it was cold and chilly especially at dawn, was totally an understatement. As much as the lilac haired boy loved winter, he wasn't actually one that could stand the coldness which was a bit, strange.

Anyone who would spare a glance at the said male would instantly think, 'Ah.. He's the definition of a living, walking burrito. Why? After all, it was Lee Felix we were talking about.

He wore a long sleeved, white shirt with his baby pink sweater on top of the said cloth. Thinking that it was not yet enough to give him the warmth he needed, he did not forget to put his  black padded jacket on. A black cap fitted firmly on his head, giving him the comfort he wanted.

Of course, the most important thing he should not forget, was the faded blue scarf encircled around his neck. The scarf his mother knitted for him before he went to Korea. The scarf, that would always remind him of his beloved mother. Oh, how much he missed his her.

He still could not believe the fact that he had been in Korea for more than quarter of the year. Felix was not yet to master the said country's language just yet, but he sure knew, at least how to make a complete sentences. Though, there would be little mistakes here and there. Coughs.

The male peeked at his backpack for the nth times, making sure that he did not forget to bring his sketchbook along with him. It was still dawn, yet he had already losing the count himself at how many times he kept checking his backpack.

"I-I should.. stop,"  he mumbled to himself, ever so softly it almost came out as a whisper. He slipped his small hands into the pocket of his jacket and continued his walk to his campus.

His eyes fluttered a few times before having his gaze roamed around his surroundings, noticing one thing about the place. No one was around, yet. That was when he remembered it was still dawn. That was when he realized he was, alone.

The petite male shutted his eyes slowly and took in a deep breath, only to release it softly after. That's what he tended to do everyday. But then, he thought he wanted to make it a little different that day.

Usually, he would already made his way towards the library by then. He did not know what came into him, but all he knew was, he wanted to just stay outdoor. Sketching. So, that was exactly what he did.

He slowly walked towards the garden located in the middle of his college, taking the spot at one of the table without even bothering to think twice. Wriggling his backpack off his back as soon as he took the seat, he rummaged through it quickly to find his baby blue case.

It took him quite awhile before a small, delighted squeak escaped pass his pink lips, indicating that he finally found the said case. The male uttered a soft hum as he pulled it out along with his sketchbook and placed them onto the table.

"There's no one... Right?"  He blinked his eyes once after questioning himself. He turned himself enough to avert his gaze around him. After what he assumed no one was around, he face the table yet again and turned the sketchbook to a blank page.

He always had a thing for doodling, sketching, drawing etcetera but never once had he have the intention to learn doing them properly. He kept telling himself to learn it properly one day. But Lee Felix, being himself. Procrastinating was like his other half, it could not be helped though.

His mood was quite good that moment, nothing had make him down so far, so he doodled down onto the blank page. With random sketches. Some even he himself could not figure out what they were. But hey, at least they look like some happy looking doodles.

The lilac haired boy straightened his back the moment he finished filling all the blank space with his own types of doodles. Expressing his emotions that morning enough. He took a full look at his works, resulting to him letting out a few giggles at how messy they looked.

"Oh well,"  he muttered to himself, shrugging his shoulders a little. A smile never left his face before a thought came across his mind. The idea of him looking back at his previous works did not sound that bad. So, he did.

He turned to the previous page of his other doodles, exactly from the first one he started. One after another. Sometime, he laughed at how funny they looked or how he was reminded to the funny events happening on the said day. Sometime, a small pout would form on his pink, plump lips at how he remembered the sad events on the other days.

Repeat. One, after another. Repeat. Until he stopped at one certain page. The smile that was once plastered on his face, slowly dropped. The soft, happy expression changed into one that was sad and empty. His shoulders slowly slumped down as if there were some weigh being placed onto them. His eyes lost its brightness that was once would manage blinding anyone who looked straight into his eyes, with how they lit up with delight and warmness.

He took in another deep breath that day, heaving it out into a soft yet defeated sigh. There he was. Reminded by his own doodles.

How he had no actual friends other than his sketchbook, which he considered as his best friend because of how many the said book listened to his feelings. How no one actual stayed beside him even though they wanted to be his friends. How they did not actually put that much effort.

They got tired too soon, of how he only utter not more than few words. Felix tried. He really did. He was not used to talking too much. But he gave the effort to talk to those who wanted to be his friends. They left, eventually. Giving up immediately at how he was not being responsive enough.

If only they knew just how hard it was to not only say a few words. If only they knew, how it was like to be an introvert. If only they knew how much courage he put to utter more than those few words he gave them. If only they knew...

He shook his head, cutting himself off his own negative thoughts that was already starting to eating him up. He could go through it all. He would be fine. He had  to. He promised his mother, and his father too, who he hoped watching over him continuously from up there in heaven.

He pulled his sleeve up a bit, enough to take a glimpse at his wristwatch only to notice he had a few more minutes before his class started. How time flew by so fast. That was when he also, just noticed the voices of the students who had already came from here and there.

He threw his sketchbook as well as his case back into his backpack immediately. If it was not because of the thought of him being late to class, he would not want to throw his best friend like that. But he did not want to be late for his class, so he had no other choice than to do so. To save some time, that was. 

Without wasting anymore time, he quickly made his way towards his class. He pulled his scarf further to cover up to his nose. Ignoring the fact that everyone else around him was walking together, whether they were in groups or partner. Ignoring the fact that he was the only one.

The only one to walk,

Alone.

[ 1341 words  ]