The Wrong Number

22

7:09 pm, Singh: Ho there, wrenched swine.

7:10 pm, Ally: If you're trying to insult me, I think you mean 'wretched'. Wrenched is a past tense verb

7:11 pm, Singh:YOU are going to be past tense if you correct me again

7:13 pm, Ally: haha to what do I owe your much appreciated company, madam?

7:15 pm, Singh: you owe my company to the fact that for the last few days you've been ignoring me. >:[

7:15 pm, Ally:I'm sorry, Anu. You know I've been busy with the student council meetings and my extra shifts at Chai Coffee. I need the money if I'm ever going to get a new laptop

7:17 pm, Singh:if I've told you once, one told you 53152893 times: YOU CAN HAVE MY MAC BOOK. I NEED THE NEW MAC ANYWAY. And that way I won't be the ignored best friend anymore

7:18 pm, Ally: but it's too expensive! And you know I don't like those tacky stickers you've covered it with.

7:18 pm: Singh:Being the person who bestowed those 'tacky' stickers on it, I'm going to say ouch.

7:18 pm, Ally: Oh bebbi, I'm sorry, you know you're the only woman I'll ever love.

7:19 pm, Singh: and my eyes are like liquid pools of colour atop my constellation of freckles beautifully complemented by the two shadows of salmon the sun casts upon my cheek yeah I've heard it all.
7:20 pm, Singh: and don't think I haven't noticed you've been seeing Ruhan Das.

7:20 pm, Ally:WHAT?!?!?!?!

7:21 pm, Singh: don't play innocent, Alankrita, he's been slipping through your front door for a few days now. And I mean ALL the possible euphemisms in that sentence.

7:22 pm, Ally: ANU I AM WORKING ON A PROJECT WITH HIM

7:22 pm, Singh: is that what you kids call it? I'm hurt Alankrita. You wouldn't even tell your best friend in the world that you're dating someone as fine as Ruhan Das.

7:23 pm, Ally:OH MY GOOD ANU I AM HELPING HIM WITH THE PHYSICS PROJECT FOR THIS SEMESTER NOTHING ELSE

7:29 pm, Singh: really?

7:30 pm, Ally: YES OH MY GOD

7:31 pm, Singh: oh whale. I just thought it would be pretty cool if you were the first one between the two of us to infiltrate the brambly headquarters of 'the popular crew' and corrupt them with our sheer mediocrity and mundane ways of living.

7:32 pm, Ally: Um I think I'll leave that to you.

7:33 pm, Singh: yeah yeah okay fine now listen I have something to tell you about my boo

7:34 pm, Ally: Faizal? You really like him, don't you?

7:34 pm, Singh: I think he's the One.

7:34 pm, Ally: aww somedody's in lou

7:36 pm, Singh: he asked me to the New Year's dinner.

7:37 pm, Ally: wow da that's awesome! But it's in January. And today is the 19th of NOVEMBER

7:37 pm, Singh: half the students in the 11th standard already have people to go with
7:38 pm, Singh: and I swear, Alankrita Sundar, I will get you a date if it's the last thing I do.

7:39 pm, Ally:I didn't think I needed one. But I can do that very well on my own, thanks

7:42 pm, Singh: the last time a guy approached you, you backed away from him and ran.

7:43 pm, Ally: Hey in my defense he was two feet taller than me and looked five years older.

7:44 pm, Singh: he was downright sexy.

7:44 pm, Ally: not my type

7:45 pm, Singh:what IS your type exactly? Boobs?

7:45 pm, Ally:I am not a lesbian, Anurekha Singh

7:45 pm, Singh: Chee, stop using my full name, you sound like my mother.

7:46 pm, Ally:I can't think about the dinner right now. I've even got my stupid project to worry about. We haven't even started the theory research because he's so bad at the numerical part of it.

7:47 pm, Singh: there, see? That's your problem. WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS YOU MAKE LEMONADE. WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU RUHAN DAS YOU MAKE IT R-RATED.

7:48 pm, Alankrita: and this is my cue to LEAVE. Bye Anu :*

7:50 pm, Singh:think about what I said Ally:*

*****