A Sapphire in the Snow

Chapter 4

Brienne felt happy, and free, and light as a feather. Was she floating? No, it was only the breeze, the ocean breeze. It enveloped her like a soft blanket. It played with her hair and brushed against her flushed cheek. Her hand was warm. It was wrapped Tormund's strong protective grasp. Sighing contentedly, she stopped along the familiar path on which they walked. She knew this place. They were on Tarth. In the meadow where she had played as a child. Where the wildflowers overlooked the deep blue waves. Brienne had always been happy here. Leaning back against his muscular chest, she felt his arm encircle her waist and pull her to him. She turned in his grasp, their eyes finally meeting. She smiled longingly at him, and he met her invitation with sweet hungry lips. She let him, encouraged him, wanted him to explore every inch of her tingling skin. It was only them, alone together, and she needed him. Then she saw herself naked, laying outstretched in the tangle of tall grass and blossoms. Tormund gazed adoringly at her and lowered himself to her caressing her bareness. She felt his weight upon her pressing down on her, both of them eager for the passion their closeness promised.
———————————————-
Brienne bolted from her sleep. She gasped, searching for breath. The sudden rush of blood to her brain as sat straight up made her head spin. Dizzy and staring straight ahead into the darkness she was half awake, half still in the dream. She was horrified to discover her inner thighs were wet from the imagined feeling of his Tormund's body so close to hers. She had dreamt of intimacy so many times before, but it had not been with him. After a few moments the shock wore off and the realization that it was just a dream dawned on her. Her breathing slowed, and she swung her lungs over the side of the bed. Steadying herself, she stood deliberately and carefully.

The only light was that thrown by the dying fire. Brienne was glad of that. It made her personal embarrassment somehow more bearable. Yet, in some illogical part of her brain she felt as if the walls had eyes, and that with one look at her, the whole of Winterfell would know of her private thoughts. That he would know.

"It was just a dream." She shook her head. Brienne told herself that it was only natural she would envision being on Tarth, her home. She was about to embark on a uncertain journey. She had high expectations for herself and perhaps feared failing Queen Sansa. Of course she would fantasize about a safe and comforting place.

As for her shocking partner in the dream. Brienne justified Tormund's appearance in her imagination as simply her mind playing tricks on her. He had been present in her thoughts the previous evening as she dined, and bathed, and readied for her rest. She was going to be traveling with him for weeks. She was probably wondering about that notion as she drifted off, and he had remained conjured in her head. Lost in her thoughts again, Brienne stood staring at the smoldering embers in the hearth. She had calmed her shock, and her racing heart had relaxed. She created a story plausible enough for her own mind to accept its unwanted dalliance. Now comfortable with her unconscious storytelling, her mind slipped unbidden back to the events that had played there a short time before. She saw once more the lush meadow in which they had layed. She once more, felt his body next to hers. This time, she imagined another soft long kiss, and his hand trailing down her ready form. When she came to herself, she was surprised that she was actually breathing heavy, and biting her lower lip. Her hand was clutching the nighttime shift she wore until a good portion in it was bunched in her hand, and pulled tight across her hips.

She forcefully shook her head. "Stop It!" She orders herself. Embarrassment had turned to anger.

Brienne turned wrathfully from the fireplace and began to dress in the near darkness. She felt foolish, and powerless against her own thoughts. This would not happen again. It could not. She would not allow it. She would fill her mind with the task at hand. Nothing and no one would interfere with her service to the Queen. Once she had fully dressed and armored herself, Brienne gathered her belongings, shoved her emotions once more to the pit of her stomach, and strode proudly out of the room. The rumpled sheets and now quiet fire left as the only witnesses to her weakness.
—————————————
Brienne walked with authority into the stables. She would see to the saddling and outfitting of her horse herself. She did not expect to find Tormund already there readying his own mount. Jon was leaning against a paddock nearby. It was obvious they had been talking and most probably about her since their conversation went quiet when she strode in.