Memorize (Book One)

A Bloody Decision

A deafening sound echoes in the depths of the Forest.

This place isn't safe anymore.

Jay's thoughts tumble inside a whirpool of tepid emotions and furious shivers, until his eyes open wide. Abruptly. Silence falls.

I'm not in the Forest. This was a bloody dream. Again!

Jay is in sweat. He feels the wind passing over his aching body. Far away, down on the horizon, the suns are rising already, a most curious cocktail of shimmering lights bouncing from the yellow and white crystals of Sulphur Bay's confines to the navy and cobalt shreds of the skies above. The fine line of the horizon is ablaze, and lethal puffs and fumes ascend slowly, creeping over the dramatic cliffs and tracing deceivingly beautiful lace-like paths in the air.

Jay quietly rises on his feet and walks toward the water-dispenser, one of the most indispensable and vital places in the Cave. Without this device, Aura wouldn't have made it so far, and they would all be dead. As he empties his cup, he feels a presence. Turning around, he sees Starling in the dark, as still as a statue and sitting on the ground.

"You awake, Star?"

"Yes, I am."

"Everybody's still asleep... How... How are you doing, mate?"

"Perfectly fine." Starling's sarcastic tone is so eerie. This is not the cheerful, fun-loving friend Jay used to know. In the dim light, he can see the torn outfit, the growing beard, the stubborn look, the tense muscles and the messy hair. A brooding storm.

"I'm sorry, Star. I mean, sorry for what you're going through."

...

"I thought I was the only one going through hell..."

...

"What are you going to do, now? I want you to know that I plan to go back to the Red City. Aura's right. We can't stay here any longer. We got people to take care of. Besides, we can't survive in here. We don't have your father's abilities to thrive in the desert."

"Not - my - father!" explodes Starling, "and then what? What will you do? The minute you're back, they'll get you. You're just... disposable material, like me!"

"I want to... steal a Vessel. I want to go back to Earth. I want to find Hera, the woman of my life. There's no other possible route for me. I see it clearly now."

"Epos was right. You're nuts. There's no escaping GloCo. You're aware of that, aren't you?"

As Jay was about to answer, the sound of light, regular footsteps echoed in the Cave, and Aura was there, standing by their side.

"I see you've made up your mind, Jay," said the hermit, a faint smile hovering on his lips. "I thought you would. Your world is calling you."

"And mine doesn't exist anymore," added Starling. "I'm going with him. Hey, you know what? I'm going back to Earth, too... Who knows, maybe someone's waiting for me there. Maybe there'll be a meaning, somewhere." Starling's voice trailed off.

"A dangerous plan. Most unlikely to succeed. Infinitesimal chances to reach your goal, if that is what you really want."

"The most lilely reward's death, anyway. The Retrievers will be on our track the moment we land. But at least we'll die with style!" There was no ignoring the mad intonations in Starling's words.

"Don't forget Kizuna. And Ananda. They deserve a chance to live a beautiful life," added Jay.

"I want to reach the Red City too," said Arende who had just joined them. "Sorry old friend, but I can't live like this. I need my Dream Pod and my health scan. You know, we'll never tell about you," said the giant man, looking at Aura with fond eyes. "Nor about... anything else."

"I am not worried about my fate. I will help you go back. My Travel Pod is still here, hidden safely. She will take you back. But hacking a Vessel is another story. Jay, you are speaking about stealing a Time-Distorter, aren't you?"

"That's right. The only way to travel a few million light years."

"And how do you plan to simply find your way around without being Retrieved? That's simply impossible!" said Arende.

"I've thought about that. I think there's a way."

"Nothing or noone can hack into GloCo's grid!" said Starling.

"Well, we would need Aura's help." Jay looked at Aura. A deep, black, riveting look that begged and ordered at the same time.

"Go on, Jay," said Aura in a sinister voice.

"We're all biologically monitored. Our blood warrants our health, while maintaining the firmest control possible. Thousands of particles patrol in our bodies, maintaining our vitals and checking on our thoughts via chemical and neuronal reactions. Which is why Aura said we might go haywire very soon if we stay here. Our nervous system's always in check."

"So? Do you intend to walk around without your blood? Fancy being a ghost?" snarled Starling.

"Precisely," said Jay. "Aura, can you help me achieve that?"

"You are a clever man, indeed. But a relentless one, too, " said Aura. "Jay, risking this would most certainly lead you to death."

"Most certainly. This leaves a chance to succeed."

"Are you insane?" cried Starling.

"This is the craziest thing I've ever heard!" said Arende.

As the conversation was growing more intense, it had awoken Kizuna, Ananda and Epos. They had drawn closer but none of them had spoken yet.

"I must be dreaming! Jay, you're not serious, are you?" said the apprentice Medicator.

"The bio particles patrolling in our bodies wear off and replicate themselves every 24 hours. Losing most of our blood and being barely alive would keep them from renewing, and allow us to be free again, clean from GloCo's agents."

"Insane!" insisted Starling. "I've lost a lot of blood recently. Believe me, pain and death will meet you where you want to go."

"If that's what he wants, why not let him?" said Epos.

"Shut up Epos!" cried Arende.

"Starling's right. You would die. Come on Jay. There must be another way!" said Kizuna, appalled.

"Listen... I've made a promise, long ago. I have a quest to accomplish. I've felt this calling for months. For years. And I'm doomed here. There's no other way but back. Back home... This tiny chance is all I've got. So I'll risk it. And if it works, I'll be able to sneak in the Red City and get myself a Time-Distorter."

"Jay, no!" cried Ananda.

"Aura, will you help me?"

"I know this is not a rushed decision. You deserve a chance. Yes... I will help you. But how about... the others?"

Everyone froze at the sudden realization that Jay intended to bleed to death, and that nothing would stop him. Maybe what made it worse was that it was indeed the only possible minuscule chance of trying something. Aura's question resonated within each soul. Each tired, disoriented, challenged, lonely soul. And the only echo perceived was the resonating sound of despair. In Jay's mind, the beauty of love and the calling of freedom were thriving like a rose developing its petals. From the other side of the Universe, a single human was sending out meaning. And questioning the world he had been living in.

This is worth dying for.

"I'll be either dead... or free. This could be worse."

They all silently agreed.