i'm sorry.

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i'm sorry that i made you angry with my choices.
i'm sorry that i left because i didn't see an option that made sense for both of us.
i'm sorry that i drink and i smoke weed.
however i'm not sorry for who i became.
because i'm happy.
i worked so hard for who i am now.
i worked so goddamn hard
to get where i am.
and to be this person.
and i like who i'm becoming.
i like her a lot.
she's good
and she's brave
and she does what she wants without apologizing
she is me
and i. am. happy.
i can breathe.
without feeling like i'm drowning.
i can laugh.
without feeling like i'm doing you wrong.
i can live. my goddamn life
without worry of making you mad.
i am happy.
and i miss you.
but this.
this life
that i have made for myself
is not what you want for me
and i can't ask you sit around and watch as i become someone you don't know.
i can't do that to you.
because you deserve to be happy too.
and i believe with everything in me
that you are happier without me
without having to watch me make choices that you don't want for me
without having to fight with me almost everyday.
because i made yet another choice you didn't agree with.
you deserve better.
and i'm sorry
so fucking sorry
for everything.
i love you forever.
please never forget that

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