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"OK BILLIAM I NEED YOU TO CALM DOWN" Richie said in an attempted soothing voice.
"C-Calm down, Calm d-d-down?" I asked pacing up and down Richie's room. "This i-i-is me w-w-we're talking a-a-about here" I hissed.
At the moment everything I was thinking and everything I did was anything but calm.
I had ran away from Stan. I know, I know it was stupid but I panicked. And as my parents like to say, when I panic I 'replace my head with a snow globe'. It becomes delicate and my brain turns into water.
"Just...don't loose your shit Bill, let's think calmly and rationally about this" Mike said, because yes Mike was here as well as Ben and Bev. Because Richie had called a Losers club emergency meeting...because yes this was an emergency!
"H-Have you even m-met me before?" I asked, still pacing up and down the room. "I d-don't do c-c-calm, I g-got stressed out in a m-medidation class"
Don't ask, can't explain.
"Bill stop being such a bitchface, just breathe" Richie said.
"Go f-fuck yourself"
"Ok, let's try something else...Bill are you sure this isn't a false alarm?" Bev asked, placing both of her hands on my shoulders.
"You t-t-think I'm capable of j-just h-having a meltdown for the f-f-fun of it?" I asked and silence threaded through the room, if there were crickets in Derry, they'd be having a blast right now.
"O-Ok, I get your p-p-point" I mumbled, placing my hands on my hips and trying to breathe.
"Let's just take a moment here..." Ben began, allowing me to breathe "What exactly set this off, how did you come to this conclusion?"
Ben should never be a therapist.
"I d-don't know it j-just happened" I said, thinking for a moment, which was difficult in my current state of mine. "W-Well I g-guess I g-got over the w-whole Stan has b-been summoned to make my l-l-life a living hell" I said and everyone mummered with agreement.
"T-Then I got used to his c-c-company, we had a 'h-h-heated' moment which gave d-dreams that I will n-never be able to explain to G-G-Georgie..." I began, tapping my fingers on my leg.
"T-The p-photobooth i-incident, l-l-late night c-conversations and c-cuddles, the m-m-music thing, h-he's easy to t-talk to, he a-actually gets me...n-no offence g-guys" I continued to ramble, basically doing a speed recap of the past few weeks.
