Sober

Chapter 11

She puts down the glass of lemon juice in front of Aga before returning to her seat. They’re currently at the garden area of the house because Aga asked for a private conversation with her. This time, he’s calmer and relaxed compared to the last time they talked.

“Thank you... Thank you for bringing Aya to me. This really means a lot.” she thanked him and smiled a little at Aga’s poker face.

“I would’ve not taken Aya here if she just didn’t shout at my face that she hates me for the first time. I felt guilty because I know she really wants to see you but I won’t let her, neither you. She might really felt bad for her to say that she hate me, and I don’t want my daughter to hate me forever.” he plainly said.

“Your daughter loves you so much, she cannot hate you forever. She might just be upset.” she said.

“Are you totally clean?” Aga suddenly asked.

“1,284 days sober. You’ve got nothing to worry about that, I’m completely managed now.”

“How can I be sure that you’re not going to do what you did before?”

Lea smiled, “I’ve lost a lot after that, I don’t want to lose more. I lost Aya once and I don’t want to lose her for the second time. You can have my word, I’m not going to screw up again.”

Aga sighed, “I still don’t trust you. Just because I’ve already allowed you to be her mother again, doesn’t mean it will be what you think it will be. I’ve got series of condition regarding to it.”

Although, that doesn’t sound good in her ears, Lea nodded. She’s too happy today to even frown, “I’m listening.”

“You are only allowed to see and to be with Aya if my presence will be there. Otherwise you can’t.”

“When that can be? Paano kung hindi magkatugma-tugma ang schedule natin?”

“Friday to Sunday are the only days I’m free from work. You can visit in the house on those days only. You can stay how many hours you may want but Aya’s bedtime is at nine.”

“So, I’m just allowed to see my daughter every weekends?”

“Unless Friday to Sunday means weekdays to you, yes,” sagot ni Aga. Gusto siyang irapan ni Lea dahil sa pimimilosopo nito pero pinigilan niya ang sarili. She seriously wants to complain about that scheme, but again, she stopped herself from doing so. Baka kasi bawiin pa ni Aga, mahirap na. Three days is still good than not having at all. “Also, you can’t take her outside the house without me.”

“Paano kung gusto ni Aya lumabas nang ako lang ang kasama?” she asked, hoping she would find a way to change Aga’s mind.

“Then I’ll tell her she’s not allowed to. She will understand.”

“Fine.” saad niya na tila labag pa sa kalooban niya ang pag-sang-ayon sa mga sinabi ni Aga. Sino ba kasing matutuwa roon? The time he sets for her to be with her daughter is very limited. Unfair.

“I’m serious with these conditions, Lea. Once I caught you not following what I said, you will never see Aya again.”

She looked away as she murmured, “Napaka-sungit. Napaka-bossy. Akala mo hindi under sa’kin noon.”

“Huwag kang bumulong-bulong d’yan. Tell to me directly what you wanted to say. As much as possible, I wanted to make things clear between you and me.”

You and me talaga? Hindi puwedeng Us? Sabagay, wala na nga pala n’on.

“Wala. Ang sabi ko, lunch will be served any minute now. If we’re already done here, might as well go back inside,” Aga just nodded at her as an approval. She stood up and dared to talk again before leaving. “Alam mo, uso ngumiti. Bakit hindi mo i-try? Libre lang naman. Guwapo guwapo, eh, laging nakasimangot.”