Our Messy Hearts ✔

Prologue

‘Love is War’

A war where no blood is shed but leaves you with countless scars. The more you fall into it, the more hopeless you become.

"It's my duty to watch over you. I didn't want to get you hurt."

"I cared more than I expected."

In this complicated world, we construct so many intagible battlefields dedicated to love. Some of us overcome all obstacles and never lose a battle. Some meet their matches. As for me, in this heart-breaking battle of love, I’m a deserter without any means of defense.

"How would you define love?"
Pagbasag ko sa aming katahimikan. Hindi siya sumagot agad. Narinig ko ang pagbuntong hininga niya sa aking tabi. Nakatitig lang kaming pareho sa langit. The stars are so beautiful. Akala ko sa novel ko lang nababasa ang mga ganitong scenes. Sa totoong buhay ay nangyayari din naman pala.

"Hmmm, siguro love is when you realize that you'd put her happiness over yours. Hindi bale ng masaktan ka basta alam mong masaya siya. Kahit hindi kana parte ng ngiti niya ayos lang basta ngumiti siya. Kapag nakita mo 'yong ngiti niya buo na araw mo kahit na ano pang shit ang maranasan mo. Kapag umiiyak s'ya your heart wants to cry, too. Nothing really matters when it comes to her. Despite her shortcomings, you'll still accept her and walk with her on the right path. You know, hindi naman kasi lahat perfect diba? Kaya ang gagawin mo mamahalin mo lahat ng mali niya at tutulungan siya para itama 'yon kung sa tingin niyo e tamang gawin 'yon." Napatigil siya sandali.

"Ikaw Arianne, how do you defined love?" Napaisip ako at mapait na napangiti.

"Siguro kapag feeling mo buo ka na dahil sa kanya. Whenever he's near, you can't wish anything anymore 'cause your everything is already there, in your front. When you give your all even though you know you have no assurance or when you love him without wanting to be loved back. You're willing to give everything you can without any expectations." Saad ko habang nasa mga bituin parin ang tingin.

"Sometimes loving someone who can't love you back is like staring at a star. You're just going to admire it because it is unreachable. Even though it hurts your neck, you're still going to stare because it's so pretty and you are happy just by staring at it." Ani ko na ngayon ay nakatitig sa kanya. Hindi ko sigurado kung ano ba ang mayroon sa mga tingin niya nang tumama ang aming mga mata.

Those occasional sad eyes make me envious of the sunlight on his face. Didn’t I already decide that I’ll be fine just staying by his side? Even if I’m not the one he love.

I’m Arianne Iresh Rivera, and this is OUR MESSY HEARTS.