Things to read when you're sad :)

10

You ever just realise how much you don't mean to someone? How easily it was for them to forget. For them to move on. To completely erase you from their life. It's heartbreaking... my heart is broken. I had broken my own heart trying to love you. I tend to do that a lot. You moved on so quickly. Why bother anymore? Love is just a chemical reaction.. It's just your brain developing different reactions for different people. Just like all other emotions. Happiness, sadness, anger, disappointment. They're all reactions. You have created a chemical imbalance though. You left me with the thought that I meant something to you. That you cared. That you wanted me. But as soon as everything goes to shit, you drop me. I was nothing to you. You used me. You used me for affection, for love, for you to have someone. All you wanted was the satisfaction of having someone by your side. You used me. You never appreciated the times I was upset or going through something. It was always about you. You always thought money could buy love or happiness, that's why you always used to buy me things I had never asked for. Though I sound ungrateful, I never appreciated the materialistic things as much as you had assumed. I just wanna feel like something to someone. I feel used. I feel unappreciated. I feel broken. You used me. You thought that you could buy my heart with whatever was in your card, but I don't care about that. The fact that I gave you things I had never given to others. The emotional strain that you had led on for so long that I let past. Your manipulative ways of which would trap myself and my emotions. You have broken me. Looking back, I asked why I had stayed. Even when you cheated. Even when you made me feel like shit. Even when you would constantly prioritise yourself, even if I were upset. I stayed because I had genuine feelings for you. I stop and think about the last 2 years. I smile. But then, I frown. I get sad. This is what it had come to. That chemical reaction is still reacting and it will be for a while. It's now imbalanced. I could never hate you though... You had made me so happy. I could never hate you for that. I'm sorry, but I'm also not. I'm sorry that things had ended up the way they had, but I'm not sorry for finally putting myself first and hurting you about it. Though hurting you hurt myself, I am learning to move on from you. You have given me emotional scars of which will take me awhile to get over completely. But I do not need you. You have no relevance in my life anymore. You do not deserve to know me for who I am and you do not deserve to be apart of my life. Good luck to you and your future. Good luck hitting on girls who don't even know you exist. Good luck going back to your sad and lonely life because you're not going to get out of that any time soon. Good luck, you're gonna need it.

My heart