"She craved his twisted darkness, the same way he grasped at the light in her shattered soul."
Natalie Gilbert has spent her entire life putting everyone else's needs before her own. So much so, that it ended up costing her the one person she couldn...
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NATALIE
Twenty four days.
It took me exactly twenty four days, before I cracked.
After the what happened between me and Kai in the hallway that day, we avoided each other like the plague.
I didn't get anymore surprise morning visits, or attempts at conversation. Not even a snide comment thrown in my direction.
We lived like two mute Buddhist monks, who couldn't stand to be around each other.
We both got up, we made our breakfast separately, I worked on piecing together the Ascendant, while Kai holed himself up in the study reading through grimoires he'd went and picked up from Bonnie's Grams house.
We spent the entire day working until dinner which we ate on our respective sides of the table, before retiring for the night in our opposite rooms.
We went entire weeks without uttering a word, and when we did it was a small, simple exchange of progress on our projects.
Whatever had transpired between me and Kai had flipped a switch, completely shutting him down. He could barely look at me without getting this odd expression, like he was trying to mentally dissect me. It was creepy, but probably not as creepy as when he caught me staring at times, doing the exact same thing.
The not talking was painful, but the loneliness was worse.
Waking up, and spending hours without so much as a sound leaving my lips, or even an interaction between me and Kai. Or the days I would eat alone in the kitchen, instinctively waiting for Damon to tell me something to make me laugh, or Bonnie to tease me about the disaster area that was my bedroom.
Or the nights I would lay awake in my bedroom, unable to hold back the tears when the dreams of him finally came. The nightmares following right after.
It was the loneliness that crushed me. At the very core of my being it felt like I was imploding into this dark hole of grief, that I couldn't fight my way out of anymore. Which was saying something.
I knew grief. I knew pain. The loneliness and abandonment, and the loss. It was supposed to be temporary.
After all these years, I could handle death, and the emotions that came after. Elena and Jeremy were the ones who fell apart. I couldn't afford to lose it every time something terrible happened or else no one would be around to pick up the pieces they left behind. Someone had to be strong or all of us would've drowned in it.
Our parents died, and I kept Elena stable, while kicking Jeremy's ass out of his drug induced moods. Vicky died and I held my brothers hand through the worst of it. Aunt Jenna died and I planned the funeral so they didn't have to.
Alaric died and I volunteered to sort through his stuff, and buy the lanterns to try and give everyone some version of peace.
Then Jeremy died. My twin, my best friend. And while Elena flew off the rails without her humanity, escaping all of the sadness. She left me completely alone to deal with our dead brother, after she impulsively cremated him in our childhood home of course.
