Blue is a Sleepy Colour

22- Home

Steven gasped as the watery shackles around his body tightened, water rushing into his lungs.

He coughed harshly, but it only caused him to choke harder. It was ironic, really. Killed by the one thing that brought him joy; his powers. He didn't know who he was without them. His eyes glanced up. The surface was right there... just moments away from his reach.

The soft glow of the moonlight illuminated the area around him, the gentle waves above him forming patterns on his face. For a moment, he marvelled at its beauty.

Then he remembered he was drowning.

It was more gruelling than he imagined, Steven thought. Not to mention unbelievably painful- his lungs burned and the sensation of not being able to breathe brought a lump to his throat. He couldn't do anything... his powers didn't work, and his wings refused to come out again.

It didn't take long before his will to fight slowly bled away. His eyes began to shut, and his strength began to weaken. He passed out just in time to see the water above him split open like the Red Sea.

Steven awoke only seconds later, but he wasn't under water anymore. He took a wheezing breath in, shooting upright as he violently coughed up the water from his lungs. After calming down, he finally looked around to see where he was. He was in... his room? Well, his mother's. Sat upon a soft bed of azure clouds, the occasional crystal waterfall and glacier around the landscape.

"Hi."

A gentle voice snapped him out of his hypnosis. It was horrifyingly familiar- it sounded like cotton candy. Slowly, he turned, his heart rate quickening as his eyes landed on the person he expected.

Lapis Lazuli stood only a metre away, a quiet smile on her face.

His breath caught in his throat.

"It's funny, isn't it? This whole fusion thing." She said, sitting down beside him, her blue dress sprawling out around her. "Two gems, sharing one body, one mind. Well, in your case, humans."

She giggled, and Steven suddenly felt joy; a warm fuzzy feeling filling his chest.

"Didn't Stevonnie teach you the true meaning of fusion?" She looked at him worriedly, and his wide eyes narrowed. He huffed.

"You know it's about love. Then... why would you abuse the power of fusion like that? Both you and Jasper suffered greatly during your month together. Malachite wasn't love, was it?" He looked away, not bearing to look at the disappointment in her eyes.

"I... I just wanted to protect them. My family. I know fusion is about love... better than anyone. But, in that moment, when Jasper held her hand out to me, I just..." He trailed off, sighing. "I saw an opportunity, and I took it."

"That's not all, though, is it?" She leaned closer. "Something happened before that."

Steven hung his head down, his curls covering his eyes in shame.

"I'm a monster." He whispered. "What I did to Jasper... I... I liked it. I liked taking my anger out on her. For a while, anyway. When it got too overwhelming, I lost control and released a beast with a thirst for blood into the world. At least the gems were safe for a bit. Not just from Jasper, but... from me, too."

'There's only room for one abomination on this hunk of rock!'

Lazuli ruffled his hair, and he flinched at her touch, screwing his eyes shut.

"You're not a monster, Steven." She sighed. "You did what you thought was best. Can't blame anyone for that, right?"

Amethyst's head snapped up when she noticed Steven stirring.

His breath was becoming increasingly more rapid, the heart monitor beeping frantically. Panicked, she rushed over to his bedside, noticing beads of cold sweat forming on his forehead.

"Garnet!" She called out in alarm. Garnet glanced up from her spot on the couch, suddenly noticing the hurried blare of the heart monitor. Fearing the worst, she hopped up the stairs, her heart plummeting when she noticed the pained look on Steven's face.

"It's time to wake up, Steven. You've been asleep long enough."

"Wake... wake up?" Steven whispered, his head raising to stare intently at what looked so much like his mother, but possibly couldn't be.

"Well... none of this is real. It's time to return to your old life." She smiled gently, as if nothing more than a glance could shatter him.

"I don't want to!" He suddenly cried, tears springing to his eyes. "I fucked everything up... the gems, Connie, my dad... they all hate me! I abandoned them because I thought I was protecting them but all I did was put everyone in even more danger." He choked on a sob, burying his face in his knees.

"I'm not surprised if they never want me to wake up either..." He said, voice small.

Lazuli had an unreadable look on her face from his words. She ended up just giving him a hard stare.

"Abandoned, huh?" She whispered. Steven watched as she closed her eyes, her form disappearing into azure clouds. He gasped as the clouds were swept away by an invisible wind, and he was suddenly alone again.

He sprung to his feet, an overwhelming feeling of dread flushing through his body. His heart beat painfully inside him, and he keeled over from terror.

He could hear it- the sound. Rushing water. Unrelenting waves.

Oh god, it was coming for him.

"No... not again!" He screamed, covering his ears and curling up onto the ground, hugging himself pathetically. His hands trembled as he held onto himself, hiding his head in his arms. Fear flooded through him with no hope of draining. He screwed his eyes shut, praying that when he opened them again, he'd be safe.

"-ven... Steven!"

Voices drifted in and out of his mind, and he could vaguely recognise the voices. His eyes clenched tighter, his face cringing at the sounds around him. They were so loud, and yet... so quiet. Images of purple skin and long flowing hair flashed before him, matching to the voice.

"Amethyst...?" He heard his own voice croak. He heard someone gasp. He centered his energy into opening his eyes, now realising they were shut.

Light flooded his vision.