daydream ' james potter

21 - preamble

21

James fidgets in his seat.

He hadn't expected to be whisked away as soon as he closed out the prefect meeting — by Lily nonetheless. "Did you hear?" she had asked. "You-Know-Who is raising an army."

"I heard," James had managed to mumble before the two were squished into a compartment already occupied by Sirius, Millie, and Demetria.

So now they're here, squished together and discussing something that both excites and terrifies James to his very core. "There won't be a war, though," he says. "Right? There can't be a lot of people who want to join in on the side of an evil wizard."

"What do you think the Slytherins have been studying for this entire time?" Lily hisses. "All Severus has ever talked about is joining the Dark Lord."

"Even if every Slytherin joined — which they won't — it'd still be an army of children." James reasons, more with himself than anything. "Surely that's not enough."

Lily clamps her lips shut. "I don't know," she finally decides. "I just wanted to warn you. We should be careful. This is our last year, and we need to be aware of our surroundings."

"I'm always aware of my surroundings," James says.

"Really, James, I'm saying you and the boys don't need to go sneaking out every month." Lily sounds worried.

Her hazel eyes are blown out in worry, and James wants to promise her that he'll never leave the castle. Only, he can't help it, because his best friend is a werewolf, and it's not like transformations are something you can choose. Maybe they should tell her. That way she won't think he's being irresponsible. He still cares about what she thinks; wants her to be proud of him.

"I'll be safe," he says instead. He'll talk to Remus about letting Lily in on their secret.

Lily nods seriously. She purses her lips and pulls James into an empty corner of the train. "So... What's up with you and Mickey? Did you guys talk?"

James feels heat rise against his neck. "Er, we did a bit more than talk."

"James!" Lily slaps him — quite hard — on the arm. "So are you two going steady now?"

James blinks. "I didn't ask him."

"And he didn't ask you?"

James shrugs, "I mean we kind of confessed to each other. Like, love and whatever."

"Love and whatever?" Lily whisper-yells. "Are you telling me you told Mickey that you love him and then you just left it?"

James fumbles with his words. He finally decides to get defensive. "Well, he didn't ask me either!"

Lily rolls her eyes, throwing her hands in the air and leaving James to stand alone. "Boys!"

-

"Can I sit here? I can't find my friend." A girl in emerald robes peaks her head into the compartment door. The first thing Mickey notices about her is that her nose is quite pointy; birdlike. The second thing he notices — once she steps past the door — is that she's awkwardly tall. Gangly, with knobby knees and arms that seem just a centimeter too long.

"Uh, I don't mind," he says hurriedly. "Please sit." This is the first year where he doesn't have Adam by his side, and it stings when it shouldn't.

He was going to sit with James, of course, but the boy was whisked off by Lily the moment he got here. Of course, he's stuck beside Mickey all summer, so Mickey can't blame him for wanting to get away as soon as he can.

Sometimes Mickey gets overwhelmed with the reminder that he doesn't have any friends of his own. All of his friends are James' friends, and Mickey doesn't want to invite himself into spaces he shouldn't.

"I'm Esther," the girl says. She's quite perky. "I'm looking for Levi Hudson. He's in Slytherin, too. Sixth year, like me."

"I don't know him," Micky says with an apologetic shrug. "Sorry." Maybe it's because he's a seventh year, or maybe because he's a Hufflepuff.

"It's alright. I'm sure he'll find his way. What's your name?" Esther stuffs her trunk beneath her feet and focuses her attention directly on Mickey.

He feels exposed for no reason. He thinks this is the year everything will go wrong. This is the year Adam will tell everyone that he's been living with James, which will start a rumor, which will make James detest him so much that Mickey will lose the closest thing to family he has.

Mickey wants to take back every word he told the bespectacled boy and hide them in his heart, where they would be safe. Now, they're out in the open, and though he trusts James not to completely ruin him, he can't help but think he's the worst thing to happen to anyone, especially to James Potter.

"I'm Mickey." He says, blinking away the self-deprecating thoughts. If James were here, he would tsk and fret over Mickey's worries. He'd tuck the longer curls of his behind his ears and smother Mickey in kisses until he retracted all of his statements.

Mickey thinks maybe James should focus on other things. Things more worthy of his attention.

"The Hufflepuff quidditch captain?" Esther perks. "Regulus talks about you; says you're really good. He reckons your team is the one to beat this year."

"Regulus Black?" Mickey asks, a bit nosy as to how the two are connected.

"Yeah, he's more Levi's friend than mine. Anyways, what's your goal getting out of here? What do you want to take your N.E.W.T.s on?"

"I don't know," Mickey shrugs. "I'm hoping to get scouted and skip the academic qualifications altogether. I want to be a professional quidditch player."

Esther squeals, and her knees knock together. "I have to introduce you to Levi. You guys would hit it off so well. He's also wanting to get scouted. Well, so is Regulus; they're kind of fighting about it."

"You'll have to point him out to me."

Esther grins, all teeth, and Mickey feels a little more at ease.

-

back after a v long time!! sorry!! genuinely :( i missed james and mickey so much :(

anyways in the second half of this story i want to focus on mickey's self acceptance, and well as james growing as his own person.

esther and levi are from my regulus fic "karma" if you want to check that out as well!

thanks to anyone who waited on this book. luv u lots xx

also pls comment if you like certain scenes or want to see certain scenes!! thanks :*