The Voice in my Head

Hurts to Recall

"Another memory..." You whispered to yourself quietly. This time you found yourself in a field of flowers. The sky above beamed down gently as you made your way through the fauna. You wandered aimlessly for a few quiet minutes, idly watching the flowers sway in the wind. Eventually, you spotted a tree in the distance. You shrugged to yourself, walking closer to the tree.

"[Name]?" You turn around to find Louis staring at you. You wave at him, watching the deer get closer to you.

"Hey Louis, fancy seeing you here." You say, before getting cut off from continuing as the deer traps you in a hug. "Uh, Louis?" You start to ask, feeling him grip you harder. He finally relents after you pat him on the back a few times. He looks away, face slightly red.

"Sorry...just...remembering something from back then." You nod, looking around.

"So...is this where you and I met up?" He nods, putting a hand on the tree.

"Yes. As a matter of fact, it's the first and last place we saw each other. Before...well..." You understood what he was implying. With a wistful sigh the deer closes his eyes, ears twitching. "I know you don't remember this, but you meant a lot to me when I was a child."

"I did?" He nods.

"Yes. It's thanks to you that I'm able to function so well today." He opens his eyes, a small smile on his face. "My childhood was...not the greatest. You helped, in some capacity." With a nod, you place a hand on his shoulder.

"Do you mind telling me more about myself?" Louis nods, sitting down and beckoning you over. You seat yourself next to him, listening raptly as he tells you about who you were as a person. As he recounted several occurrences between the two of you, you felt something brush the back of your mind occasionally. Louis laughed to himself as he recalled one instance early in his childhood.

"There was one time I got caught sneaking out of the house. Father was so upset that night..."

"You wanted to see the walls outside the manor." He whipped his head towards you, making you flinch at his speed. He blinked once.

"...Yeah, how did you?" Your eyes widened as you realized what he implied.

"I...don't know... It just...came to me, I guess?" He sidled closer, grabbing your shoulders.

"Do you recall why I wanted to leave?" You racked your brain for an answer.

"You...said you felt trapped. Despite being...bought?" You said haltingly. Louis nodded.

"Yes, that's it!" He pulled you in for a hug. "Anything else, [Name]?" You shook your head.

"I think that's it." A bout of dizziness assaulted you, and you leaned more into the deer's embrace. He picked up on it, pulling you away slightly and examining you closely.

"Are you okay?" You put a hand to your forehead, rubbing it tenderly.

"Y-yeah, just got a little dizzy." Louis frowned.

"We should stop for tonight then. Won't do you much good to remember things if you'll be in pain the whole time." You bit your lip. While you disagreed with the deer, you knew he was in the right. Standing up and brushing off the grass, he helps you stand too. "I'll see you soon, alright?" He mumbles. You nodded, smiling softly.

"Yeah, see you soon, Louis." Another wave of dizziness blurs your vision, and soon you find yourself staring up at the ceiling of Gosha's apartment. You sleepily glanced over at the clock. There was still some time left before you usually woke up, so you rolled back over to try and get some more rest in.