|·Idiots With Swords·| Inosuke X Reader

12

Once more, we found ourselves at the wisteria house. Hisa was resting and instead had her relatives help us out. Which is understandable, she's very old and needs vacation time as well! They gave us food and fine tea, which Inosuke dug right into as if he's never eaten before in his life.
"So. What's the plan here?" I asked as I sat against the wall, sharpening my blades while making direct eye contact with Uzui.
"Once we infiltrate the red light district, we first have to find my wife." He said calmly. "I'll be looking around for information on the demon as well."
"This is unbelievable!" Zenitsu shouted.
"What?" Uzui asked with narrowed eyes.
"Don't mess around and use your subordinates to find personal brides!" Zenitsu screeched. "I'm gonna say it honestly! Weird ass people like you will never be popular!"
"You telling him or reminding yourself, jackass?" I sneered from the corner earning a stern look from Tanjirou and a thumbs up from Inosuke.
"You moron! My wife is there right now collecting information on the demon! Our regular contact was cut off, so now I'm going there too!" Uzui shouted loudly. "Don't believe me? Here are the letters!" He tossed thick stacks of letters to the floor.
"Oh yeah?" I asked. "How they doing by the way? I haven't seen them in forever."
"Wait.. Them?!" Zenitsu asked loudly.
"I have three wives, and they are as beautiful as ever." Uzui said proudly. "Thanks for asking, (y/n)!"
"The fuck do you mean but three wives you bastard!" Zenitsu shouted angrily.
Uzui quickly punched the boy in the stomach to silence him. "Any other complaints?!"
"Um.. In the letters, you reminded them several times to do their best and not stand out.. So how are we going to do this?" Tanjirou asked curiously.
"Well, we're going to disguise ourselves. And as much as I hate it, be plain." Uzui sighed. "You're going to do something and then infiltrate. My three wives are top of the line female ninja, kunoichi. We belive that the red light district is the ideal place for demons to hide. When I infiltrated as a customer, I couldn't find any traces of a demon. So for that reason.. We went a bit further than mere customers. We've narrowed the suspicious stores down to three. That's where you will look for my wives and gather intel."
"And which stores would those be?" I asked as I set my blades to the side.
"'Suma' in the Tokito House. 'Makio' in the Ogimoto House. And finally 'Hinatsuru' in the Kyougoku House." He numbered off.
"Aren't your wives already dead?" Inosuke asked, only to get punched as well.
A knock sounds on the other side of the sliding door, where several people have brought in a large box. "We've brought the items you've asked for."
"Thanks." Uzui deadpanned.
I pulled the box into the room and with one glance, I recoiled immediately. "So. This is your plan, you sick freak."
"What? You're the ones who stopped me from taking Shinobu's girls!" Uzui sneered at me. "Luckily for me, your definitely better looking than them, so it'll be easy giving you away!"
"Of course she's better looking than us!" Zenitsu groaned.
"She's probably more beautiful than your fucking wives anyways!" Inosuke hissed as he sat back up.
"... You're both idiots.." I grumbled. "But i guess its better me than them.. I'm not doing anyone's makeup though, you bastard." I grabbed a light violet kimono from the box and a lilac colored ribbon before storming out.
"Wait for me!!" The boys shouted as they grabbed their clothes and shuffled after me.
"What?" I groaned as I entered an empty room.
"We um.." Tanjirou blushed and scratched his chin.
"You see.. The thing is.." Zenitsu said bashfully.
Inouske just rolled his eyes and shouted, "I don't wear clothes!"
"You're wearing pants right now.." I said with a raised eyebrow.
"I can fix that." He said bluntly.
"Do that, and I'll cut off your little fella with a dull kitchen knife." I threatened before sighing. "I'll help you then I guess." I pulled up the different layers of Tanjirou's kimono. "See this white one? Put it on first. Then the colored one. Then the sash. Got it?"
They all nod and shuffled out of the room, leaving me to change by myself. I changed into the new kimono quickly, and folded my uniform and my haori neatly before setting them down. A knock sounded from the other side as a woman walked in. "Miss (y/n).. Please allow me to help you with your hair!"
"If you want to, I'm not gonna stop you i guess.." I mumbled.
She had me sit down and combed my hair out gently before taking the ribbon from my hands. "You have really beautiful hair."
"Oh.. Um thanks.." I said with an awkward cough.
She twists my long hair into a bun, fastened it with a wooden clip that looked like a flower, and tied the ribbon to keep it in place.
The woman left the room wordlessly and I made my way back down the hallway.
"Wow.. You clean up very nicely, miss!" An older man said with a smile.
The woman next to him nodded with an enthusiastic grin, "You look so good, (y/n)!"
"Um.. Thanks." I bowed my head and walked back into the room where the boys are.
"Oh, (y/n)! You look good!" Uzui praised, "say hello to Inoko, Sumiko, and Zeniko!"
I take one look, and hit the floor laughing. "What the fuck happened to you guys?!" I wheezed as I tried to catch my breath, but when I saw them again, I fell into another fit of boisterous laughter.
Their hair is a disaster, and they have a copious amount of makeup and powder pressed to their faces.
"Hey shut up! They look great!" Uzui shrieked throwing a comb at me.
"Fine. You know what, do my makeup to so they won't feel left out!" I said with a grin as I took a seat.
"Thanks (y/n)!" The boys cheered.