Chapter Thirty Seven

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EDITED 5/30/2020

Alec had reluctantly wandered into the room; Magnus had left the room with tear-stained cheeks and a gorgeous smile on his face. He had offered no explanation to either man, instead telling Alec to go into the room to speak to Clary. Wesley had argued, wanting to know what was going on immediately. Magnus had calmed him, saying that once his husband was done speaking to Clary, Wesley would have the opportunity to speak to her as well.

Alec closed the door behind him, hesitating in the doorway and eyeing her warily. She was sitting up on the bed, back against the headboard with the pillows on the ground, out of her way. Clary was looking at him too, like she didn't know what to say.

"Are you okay?" Alec broke the silence. "You scared me half to death with the screaming.."

"I woke up," Clary sighed, "Wesley went to take a shower and do lunch, and then I got up to wake Magnus up and when I touched him I remembered everything, all the memories Jocelyn made him take from me."

"Wow." Alec moved forward and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at her in surprise. "That's great."

"Alec." Clary sighed. "Remember how I told you that Luke was the only father I ever knew?"

"Yeah." Alec leaned forward, balancing his elbows on his knees.

"That isn't true." Clary said. "My memories were altered to make it seem that way. In reality, Luke was only there for my mother. I was a burden to him. He'd forget me at school sometimes, leave me to my own devices on the rare occasion that he had to watch me. But far more often, I was with Magnus. Like Tessa said yesterday, Magnus has always been my Dad. He is my father; I grew up knowing Raphael as my brother. I know this is weird and complicated and not what was expected, but Magnus is leaving it up to us to figure out whether or not our relationship needs to change with this new . . . development."

"You're asking if I want to be your Dad?" Alec clarified. He looked conflicted, like he wasn't sure what he wanted to say.

"Uh," Clary hesitated. "This is so confusing." She dropped her head into her hands.

Alec sighed and rounded the bed, slipping in beside her. "Clary." He angled his body towards her and grabbed her hand in both of his. "I love you, Clary. I always will." He promised, rubbing his thumb across her pulse point. "No matter what you decide you want from me, I will be here. I will be your big brother; I'll be your Dad if that's what you want. But Clary, when you decide, you have to be sure. Like you said, this is complicated. Sure, Magnus and I already have Raphael and Madzie, but if it's decided that you're our daughter too, not just Magnus', I wouldn't want to hide that. I love my kids, and I'm proud of them. I'd want to brag on you, not as my sister but as my daughter. That could become complicated, and then there is mom and dad, who think of you as their child."

"I guess there's no way for this to work, huh?" Clary tossed her hair out of her eyes.

"Magnus will always be your father, Clary. No matter what is decided, Magnus isn't going anywhere. And you don't have to decide to be my daughter just because I'm married to your father. But I didn't say that it wouldn't work. We have options, but I refuse to let you make a rash decision here. We can talk about our options, we can discuss with the people involved, namely Magnus, Wesley, Izzy, Raphael, mom and dad. But we aren't going to make a decision today."

Clary nodded. "What options?"

Alec sighed. "Well, option one is that nothing between us changes. We go on like always, I'm your big brother and you're my baby sister."

Clary nodded and waited for him to continue. "Option two, to the outside world nothing has changed and behind closed doors we are father and daughter. I'm not as fond of that option since I've done enough hiding for the last twenty-three years. Not even mentioning my past lives."

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