Twelve

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My weekend is mostly composed of lying in bed, gazing up at the white painted ceiling, replaying the events of Friday night. I recount every word he said, over and over. I picture his face, illuminated in the street light, running over each contour and edge. I think about his eyes, and I feel like melting. The more I think about what he said the more stupid I feel for hating him. 

But it's not a crush. At least, I don't think it is.

Naturally, my parents had several questions about why I was in the street at half ten at night, chatting with the neighbours in only a short dress and hoodie. 

"I'm pleased you're making friends, y/n, but you don't choose the best times to do so," my mum said with a laugh, barely looking at me. 

My dad rolled his eyes behind her, giving me a quick hug hello, more than my mum has given me in years. 

"I'm proud of you, honey"

"Thanks," I said, following my dad's gaze into the kitchen, where my mum was on the phone, "Do you think she's proud too?"

He laughed. "I'm sure she appreciates it much more than you think. And I know Cassie and Sam appreciate it too. The gods know those Covaci kids need all the friends they can get..."

"What, why?" I asked.

"Well, after what happened with-" My dad stopped himself, glancing into the kitchen to see if my mum is within earshot. She was, shaking her head at my dad, her hand over the phone.

"Nevermind," he said dismissively "Anyway, you should probably be heading up to bed, y/n".

I frowned. He never tells me when I need to go to bed. As I make my way upstairs I remembered something Katrina said a few days ago: "Poor kids, what they went through...".

Even now, three days later, as I throw on my school uniform, I can't stop thinking about what they could mean. What's the big secret? What could the Covacis have gone through which is so unspeakable? And, more importantly, why can't anyone tell me? Christ, even Katrina knows. Then again, she thrives on gossip. I see my eyes widen in the mirror as I realise something. maybe Katrina can help me get to the heart of this mystery; she's not exactly tight-lipped.

I make a mental note to drop by the Kafe later as I head downstairs. The house is empty, of course. I slip on my bomber jacket and shoes, smiling at the pair of mismatching flip-flops which are still lying by the front door. I catch my reflection in the mirror hanging above the shoe rack. My hair in a high ponytail, face almost unrecognizable under all the makeup, hoops swinging from my ears like a pair of price tags. None of it looks like me. But the smile. It exuberates authenticity and genuine happiness. And now, all I can think about is the boy who caused it.

I open the front door and, to my surprise, see Emilia and Matei on the other side of the road. Emilia immediately beams and waves me over with a gloved hand. I go over and we exchange our hellos, before making our way down the road. 

"So, no flip-flops today?" Matei asks, looking down at my trainers.

I laugh. "No, not today. I don't think it's a look the school would approve"

"I guess. Well, you look...different" He says, somewhat disappointedly.

I don't respond, partly because I can't think of anything to say, and also because I'm annoyed at myself. We both know what he means. After everything he said to me on Friday, I guess he's disappointed to see me looking like one of them again. I told him I understood, I thanked him for reassuring me, and now- without knowing -I've gone back on everything I said. What kind of message does that send out to him?

Thankfully, Emilia breaks the silence, cutting in to walk between me and Matei. 

"So, you said your grandmother was a wildie, y/n?"

"Yeah, she was" I reply, instinctively looking down at the pendant hidden under my school tie.

"Does that make you a wild wolfblood? I mean, can you do all the things they can do?"

"Kind of. I've never lived in the wild, but when I was growing up my dad would tell me all the ancient myths about the wolfblood Gods and Goddesses. He learnt them from my grandmother."

"Are they true?" Emilia asks.

"Probably not" Matei answers before I can. 

"It's only as likely as human religions, Emilia," I add. "The stories, they all happened so long ago, we don't know."

"What are they about?"

I shrug "The ones I can remember are mostly moral tales, some teach you about wildie traditions, ansion, eolas..."

"Really? Can you do them? Ansion and eolas?" Emilia asks me, both siblings looking at me expectantly.

"I used to. It's different in the city though, more difficult. But then again some stories say you just have to believe you can do it..."

"Do you believe that?"

"...I'm not sure..."

"Could you teach me?" Emilia asks eagerly.

"Emilia-" Matei begins, but gets cut off by a glare from his sister. She turns back to me and looks at me pleadingly. She has the same eyes as her brother. Not only in terms of colour, but I can sense something more. A past pain, something tormenting which can't be overcome.

"Please?"

"I mean, I don't see why not. It will take time though..."

The young wolfblood beams up at me and I feel a sense of accomplishment; at least I haven't fucked things up with Emilia. I continue to answer her relentless questions (with the occasional comment from Matei) until we reach the school gates. Beyond them, I smell TJ and another wolfblood -a girl- meandering amongst the crowd. However, what panics me even more is Hannah and Aria standing nearby. Thankfully, their backs are turned towards us, so when I make my excuses to the Covacis and head towards Hannah and Aria, I can hope they haven't seen me.

"y/n!" Aria exclaims, "Where were you on Friday?"

"Uh..sorry, I didn't feel well"

"Shame, you missed a great one," Hannah says, barely looking up from her phone.

"Well, what about this Friday? We're having a small get-together, celebrating Hannah's success" Aria offers.

"Of course," I say without thinking. I'm sure I'll regret that later. "What success?" I ask Hannah.

"Qualifying for the regional taekwondo tournament," she explains, showing me a promotion poster on her phone, "The final qualifying match is tonight. Kinda big-headed to start organising a victory party, but, what can I say? I've got this in the bag." She says with a grin.

"Will you come to the match tonight?" Aria asks, linking her arm with mine, "We'll be going to the Kafe afterwards too".

Shit, I guess I have no choice.

"Sounds good!" I say, mirroring the girls' excitement. The bell rings and we head towards the science block for our first lesson. Aria keeps hold of me, and once we're in the corridor she leans in to whisper in my ear.

"Charlie wouldn't shut up about you on Friday. I mean, he was drunk but, that's when you get the truth out of people..."

"What did he say?" I ask, trying to maintain a calm outward appearance.

She shrugs. "Come on Friday and he can tell you himself".







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