Learning to Love the Other Side

I Killed a Man Today(James)

Dedicated to @harrypotternerd1024 . Thank you for sticking with my story from day one:)

The air was permeated with the smell of gunpowder and lead, making James' nostrils and eyes burn and water. The lack of light and pitch dark early hours of the morning made it difficult to even see his own boots, let alone the enemy. James was used to the sound of a rifle or two shooting in unison, but hundreds of guns being triggered every second made his ears ring, and made him feel confused and disgruntled; where were the shots coming from and from whom were they coming from? He couldn't tell, which caused his mind to go into a slight panic and overdrive. It wasn't hot yet, as the sun hadn't made its loud appearance, but James found himself covered in a cold sweat. His body was reacting in alarm to the unknown, and the surprise of the attack. He could feel his muscles tense and his hands tremor; it felt like his limbs were moving in slow motion as he cocked his gun and crouched in the dirt. James could taste the metallic aroma of blood on his tongue as he chewed the inside of his cheeks and inhaled through his mouth. It was a surreal feeling, and not at all as gallant as he or the other boys had imagined. James wouldn't be embarrassed to admit that battle was indeed terrifying. 

"Get down, White! What the hell are you doin'?" James yelled over the shots, grabbing his friend by the jacket and dragging him down beside himself. 

Private White's eyes were wide, and his breathing shallow. He wasn't moving and resembled a statue. James didn't understand why he wouldn't move. Sure, they were all scared, but they couldn't just not move and stand out in the open to be an easy target.

"White, snap out of it! You gonna go an' get yourself killed standin' around like a fool like that!" James exclaimed angrily. He wasn't sure where his anger was coming from, other than the fact that he was scared out of his mind. 

"Just stay low, and stick close to me," James added, a nervous tremor in his voice as he began moving towards the yells and where the Major had yelled to his soldiers where the Yanks were approaching them. 

White didn't respond but seemed to process what James had said as he followed the braver of the two towards the enemy. 

"How the hell are we supposed to know who we is supposed to shoot?" James cursed, squinting his eyes as he put a wobbly finger on the trigger. 

"Shoot the enemy, dammit! Pull the trigger, boys!" James heard what he thought was their Major's voice. 

James' blonde hair was plastered to his sweaty forehead as he tried to wipe the sweat out of his eyes with his arm so that he could maybe see a bit better. It didn't help much. He prayed to God that he wouldn't shoot one of his battle buddies as he aimed to kill. 

He gulped as the sun began to peek over the horizon and the shadow of the boy became clearer. It was a blue coat. His senses were being tested and in overdrive to the max, but he was able to aim correctly despite his shakiness and prepare to shoot. His breathing became labored and ragged, and his mind plagued him with the reality of what he was about to do. James wasn't sure if he could actually do this. 

Could he pull the trigger? There was a chance he would miss, but James knew his aim didn't falter often. He could very well end this boys life. 

"I can't..." James breathed, shaking his head. He couldn't kill someone. But before James really knew what he was doing, he was pulling back on the trigger, causing the bullet to release and speed towards its unsuspecting target.

James was glued to the spot, and his eyes stared wide-eyed at the boy not too far before him. James had shot him, and the Yank had fallen to the ground and wasn't moving. Thankfully for James, the sound of yelling, and cries of pain muffled together, so he wouldn't hear his target's cry or if he wasn't alive to do so. James wouldn't find out absolutely, but the way the boy's eyes stared unblinkingly and his crimson-stained chest stood in stark contrast to the murky green color of the ground and bright blue uniform, James had delivered a deathly blow and he knew it.