𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 - 𝐜𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐯𝐞𝐬

(ELEVEN)

Jiwoo felt terrible on the drive home. Songhee kept one hand on the steering wheel and the other on Jiwoo's thigh, and she sang along with the radio as if she didn't have a care in the world. Jiwoo, however, was sitting stiff and silent. Every movement hurt, and she felt disgusted with herself.

But she knew better than to say no to Songhee. So she always just let it happen.

The car stopped a few houses away from Jiwoo's, per her request, but Songhee stopped her and locked the car as she reached for the door handle. "One second, I have something for you," she said. Jiwoo flinched, but her tension dissipated when she saw what Songhee had grabbed from her purse. A small bottle of concealer. "I know it's your shade. This way, your sister doesn't have to find out what kind of person you are." She kissed Jiwoo one last time before pressing the bottle into her hand and unlocking the doors.

Jiwoo stumbled out of the car, dumbfounded by how... considerate Songhee had been. She limped home, still not recovered from what had just happened. Normally it wasn't this bad, but tonight she had made Songhee angry and she faced the consequences for it.

She crept up the stairs and into the bathroom. At this point, she didn't care if she woke Hyunjin up; she felt dirty and needed some time to think. She turned on the shower and set the water as hot as it would go. For a few minutes, she stood there, ignoring the pain from the hot water as she watched her skin turn red. It almost hid a few of the lighter marks on her stomach and thighs, but the darker bruises seemed to stand out even more. Jiwoo sobbed as she tried to make herself feel better. She was practically scrubbing off her skin with how violently she tried to wash away the feeling of being absolutely appalled by herself and by what she'd done.

Normally after a hookup, she simply felt numb. But tonight was different. Tonight she was ashamed of herself.

And for some odd reason, she couldn't stop picturing her new friend in her head. Sooyoung never would've done this to me. But then she thought back on everyone she'd said the same thing about before. They were all kind to her in the same way Sooyoung had been, and they'd all only been doing it because they had a goal in mind: Jiwoo.

It always ends the same way. She'll be just like them, and she'll throw me away too.

Of course Sooyoung would do this to me.