•cold• Javier Escuella x reader

groceries and panic •ch 16•

(Y/N) sat beside Javier as the wagon traveled along the road to rhodes

"Honestly that whole meet up sounds like a trap, I wouldn't trust those putos if my life depended on it" remarked Javier as they passed by a field

"Hmm?" (Y/N) hummed as she looked over to Javier

Javier relaised he was thinking out loud and immidiantly ducked his head "sorry, I was just reflecting over that meeting that Arthur told us about"

(Y/N) chuckled and shook her head "it's alright, and honestly I couldn't agree more... they are the same bastards that killed me and Sadie's loved ones after all"

Javier nodded and kept his eyes on the road as he hummed silently "how come you don't talk much about your family mi querida..?" He pondered

(Y/N) stiffened and took a sharp intake of breath, she glanced over at him as he glanced over as well with a soft expression "i-its alright if you don't want to talk about it, I understand how you feel, ya know... loosing a family and all"

(Y/N) sank down a bit and sighed "no no it's not that I'm not ok, I'm feeling way better than I've felt back at Colter..." she leaned on his side and closed her eyes as he wrapped one of his arms around her shoulders comfortingly

"I-its just that, I feel like if I dont talk about them much things will shape up to be better, or maybe it's just that I miss them so much it just hurts to bring them up..." she gave a choke and relised she was staring to cry

"Oh jeez..." she giggled awkwardly in a sad tone as she pulled away from Javier and wiped her eyes "ugh I'm such a damn wreck sometimes" she joked

Javier stared at her in worry and pulled over, turning to face her and placing his arms on her shoulders "hey hey hey, look, todo va a estar bien" he paused as he noticed her tip her head to the side in confusion before giving a soft smile "everything's going to be okay"

(Y/N) gave a sad smile while trying to pull herself together, wrapping her arms around Javier before breaking into a sob "I just wish that I had died back there with them, maybe then I wouldn't have so many memories of them suffering in their final moments, maybe my brother would still be alive if he hadn't sacrificed himself for me... what a stupid mistake..."

Javier's eyes widened and then he softly smiled and wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly "he made a brave decision, because without him, I wouldn't have you, the gang wouldnt have you, you're such a positive impact in our lives and help us out in so many ways that you may not reconize... You may have lost your family, but you had also gained a new family... us..."

(Y/N) closed her eyes and breathed in Javier's scent as she gave a small sad smile as he began to brush his fingers through her hair "I'll be here for you every step of the way.." he breathed softly

(Y/N) pulled away from him and a smile spread across her face "thank you Javi.." she giggled

"Any time mi amor" he smiled back and wiped a tear from her face

(Y/N) wiped her eyes dry and then looked back up at Javier with determination in her eyes "now come on! Let's go buy ourselves some medical equipment!"

Javier laughed and picked up the reins, slapping them down "let's just make sure we don't accidentally run over someone while in rhodes!" He joked as they passed through a barn