Chrysanthemums

Chapter 19

"Mr. Anderson, where were you?" Eva asked the minute she got into the room and saw him.

"Hm?" Blaine looked up, seeing that she and Charlie were the first ones there, like always. "Oh, I was sick. But now I'm back and feeling better."

William genuinely thought Blaine was sick, and it remained between Kurt and Blaine that he had been mentally unhealthy instead of physically unhealthy. Blaine had felt guilty about not telling William, but Kurt pointed out to him that sick was sick, be it physically or mentally.

He'd finally gone to his doctor, and the only reason he got through it was because Kurt went with him for moral support. He'd also gotten a counselor to talk to. They'd determined that he had very severe, untreated PTSD, and were working on tactics to get his flashbacks and nightmares to go away and how to deal with them when they did happen.

"Mr. Hummel? Can I talk to you for a minute before class starts?" Charlie asked.

"Yeah, of course."

They went to William's office, and sat down. She anxiously tugged her backwards baseball cap further down.

"Is something wrong?" he asked. "I don't think I've ever seen you so nervous."

"Well, sorta." She played with the ring on her finger. "It's... I didn't really want to talk to Mr. Schue about it, because he's not the best with personal problems like this, and I honestly didn't know how to bring it up with Mr. Anderson... I guess I'm only saying it now because I've been putting it off and making excuses."

He looked at her seriously. "You can tell me, Charlie."

She glanced out the window, back at the classroom, biting her lip. He looked out as well, following her gaze and seeing Eva talking to Blaine about something.

"Is this about your crush on Eva?"

She looked startled. "You know about that?"

"Hun, you're obvious. She's the only person who hasn't noticed, being a disaster bisexual herself."

Charlie laughed. Then she looked at him hopefully. "You think she's bisexual?"

"There's a pride pin on her backpack and she's told me she's out and proud. So, yeah, I think there's a possibility."

"Yeah, but it's just the rainbow flag, so I didn't know if it was the general one or being used as the gay one. 'Cuz I... Mr. Hummel, I'm a boy," Charlie blurted out.

He blinked. "That's not what I was expecting. Y–"

"I– I mean, it's why I went to you. You– you are too, right?" He suddenly looked frightened.

"A boy or trans? Because I am a boy, but I'm cisgender."

Charlie's face was becoming bright red, and he tried to get up. "I'm sorry, I– I should get to class–"

"Charlie, sit down."

He did, eyes trained on the ground.

"You know I'm not mad at you for that, right? I mean, I can see the confusion. Especially my voice, I mean, come on." Kurt smiled as he got him to laugh.

"You know they'd all accept you, right? Eva definitely would. And the people in the school who don't, screw 'em. You didn't need them anyway."

"How do you know she's not transphobic?" he asked quietly.

"Well, the other day when Max didn't know what 'trans' meant, I heard her explaining it to him the next day. Also, all the times Tracy's father has been mentioned, she's never said anything intolerant. Not that I've heard."

There was a loud noise, and they both looked to the choir room. Eva had clearly accidentally knocked something over, and was apologizing. Kurt saw one of the things she'd knocked over was a glass of water or some kind of drink, and she pulled off her sweater, which got soaked.

Kurt stood up abruptly as he realized it'd gotten onto Blaine's jacket sleeve.

"Mr. Hummel, what's wrong?" Charlie asked. He hardly heard him, watching as Blaine laughed it off, heading back to the office.

Blaine gave him a severe look when he got back, clearly wondering what to do.

"Charlie, can you keep a secret?" Kurt asked.

The boy nodded, looking between the two. "Yeah, of course. I mean, you're keeping mine now."

"Great. Blaine, get over here, put on my jacket," he hissed.

"What? It's not that wet," Blaine said, but his jacket was dripping on the ground.

"Blaine. Jacket. Now." Kurt was already taking off his own.

Blaine walked over to him, reluctantly pulling off his jacket. "They already think we're dating, this isn't going to help."

"I'd rather pick up notes off the choir room floor that talk about 'Handerson' than ones that harass you," Kurt responded, helping Blaine take his jacket off.

The bandage around his forearm was soaked too, and when he unwrapped it and threw it away, Charlie covered his mouth to stop from reacting.

Because they may have been stitched up and healing, but the cuts were still bad. He could immediately see why they didn't want the others to see them.

Blaine pulled on Kurt's jacket, seeing a tattoo on his wrist.

It wasn't the tattoo he noticed. It was what his skin was like underneath it.

Those are scars, he realized. From... from himself.

"Kurt–"

"C'mon, we've gotta get back to the classroom." He nodded for Charlie to get up and he did, heading to his seat beside Eva. Kurt got back out to his usual spot as the class was starting.

Blaine stayed back, comprehending what he'd just seen. Kurt had just sacrificed himself so Blaine didn't have to wear a jacket with a wet sleeve.

He headed back out, trying to clear it from his head.

"Mr. Anderson, you're back!"

He smiled. "That I am."

"Where were you?" someone asked. He could tell several of them were wondering.

Eva was staring at his jacket with wide eyes, having seen Kurt wearing it earlier.

"Oh, I was sick." He brushed it off like it was nothing.

"Alright, let's get started," William said, clapping his hands together. "We're doing duets, and you are allowed to pick your partners. But it's also going to be a competition– I want to you to partner with the person here you have the most chemistry with, whatever kind it is.

"Whoever has the best connection, the best chemistry, wins. If you don't really know anyone here, it's your chance to get to know each other better. You'll split your practice time between working on chemistry and your song."

He finished instructions, and they turned to each other excitedly. Kurt smiled when Eva immediately turned to Charlie and started talking animatedly.

William walked over to Kurt and Blaine. "I was hoping you two could do an example, show them what I'm looking for."

"Sounds like a good idea," Kurt said.