Forgotten Memories

Chapter 15

Cole hadn't spoken to Arael for two days and he didn't come out of his room to try to get her to remember him or to try to get her to give him a chance. He'd given up and as much as she didn't want it to bother her, it did.

Cole sat in the chair facing the window in his room. He hadn't moved from that spot in the two days but he didn't feel tired or hungry. All he did was sit in that chair and look out the window.

"Cole, may I come in?",he heard Arael call from the other side of the door. He didn't answer her though.

"Cole, are you there?",she asked quieter than before, as if disappointed that he didn't answer. His subconscious shouted yes but he still remained silent, unable to talk to her.

"Cole, I'm coming in",she told him before he heard his bedroom door open. Soft footsteps made their way to him.

"Why didn't you answer me?!",she snapped angrily as she stopped in front of him after noticing him on the chair. He slowly looked up to meet her eyes but couldn't find his voice to answer her. She took in his dead eyes and thinner body and her expression immediately softened. He had already looked ill when she had seen him the night they had kissed but at least he had still looked alive then. Now he looked hollow and lifeless, like a dead man walking. Or sitting in his case.

"What are you doing to yourself, Cole",she asked softly as she kneeled down in front of him. He closed his eyes as she ran her fingertips over his cheek, enjoying the warmth of her hand. His whole complexion seemed greyer and his cheek bones stood out slightly from all the weight he'd lost.

"You need to eat something and go to sleep",she told him. She stood and carefully pulled him to his feet, making sure he was stable and wouldn't fall over if she let him go.

"I'm going to go make something for you to eat while you go shower",she told him. He allowed her to guide him to the bathroom where she left him on his own to shower. After turning on the water he striped down and got in. His muscles relaxed slightly as the hot water ran over his fragile body and burned his icy skin.

A while later he turned off the water and got out. He stood in front of the full length mirror and realised why Arael was so worried. The thought of losing his love had made his body put all its energy into numbing the pain and so it stopped virtually all of its other functions causing him to lose weight more rapidly than he should. He had also lost a lot of his colour and looked almost transparent with his veins visible beneath his skin. The person in the mirror sickened him and he turned away, unable to look at himself anymore. After getting dressed into something warm, he slowly made his way down to the kitchen.

"When last did you eat something?",Arael asked him as he walked in. 'Lunch, two days ago',he thought. She sighed as when he still did not speak and realised she would have to give him more time.

"I see you're still not talking",she said softly as she brought him a large plate of food. He looked down as he picked at it, not really having an appetite even though he wanted to help his body get back to what it looked like before.

"Cole, please eat something",Arael begged. He looked up at her and saw the worry in her eyes. She was scared of what had happened to him and it made it worse that she was the reason it happened. He looked down and brought his fork up to his mouth and started eating. She let out a breath she didn't know she was holding as he swallowed the bite of food.

"Good. Thank you",she said and turned back to her food. They ate in silence and as hard as he tried, Cole couldn't finish more than half of his plate. Arael cleared the table and took hold of his cold hand before guiding him back to his room, knowing his body would need time to adjust to eating again.

"Now please get some sleep",she said softly as she led him to the bed. He got in and she sat down beside him as he looked up at her.

"I'm sorry... I have to let you know that I'm sorry for everything that I've put you through. No one should have to deal with someone that causes them that much pain and trouble but you did. You stayed even when I gave you absolutely no reason to and I'm thankful that you did. You're an amazing man, Cole, and I know that you deserve so much better than me so thank you for not giving up on me straight away. I know you've given up now but I'm going to prove to you that you shouldn't. Even if I can't remember you from before, I don't need those memories to to love you. I can love you with memories from now. Just don't leave me on my own... I want to love you",she finished softly before looking up at him. He managed to give her a small smile. She kissed his cheek before turning off his light and leaving the room. He continued to smile into the darkness and replayed her words over and over again in his head praying that she meant what she said.