Crush Culture [Tododeku] [DISCONTINUED}

Part 10: All We Have Are Memories Pt.1

If you don't read the note afterwards I'll steal your kneecaps.

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Third Person POV

"I like you."

The roaring in Todoroki's ears stopped. The three words that he had been itching- aching-  to say were lying out there for Midoriya to see, raw and vulnerable. They suspended themselves in the air like a shaky gust of wind. They could be blown away in seconds. There was no turning back now.

Everything focused on the two boys. The rest of the universe ceased to exist, simply because it didn't matter. The stars with their alluring twinkle, the delicate blades of grass, the wind that mysteriously died down right in this moment; none of them mattered. Todoroki and Midoriya locked eyes and the air settled on them. And even though the receiving end of this confession had yet to answer, Todoroki hadn't felt this calm in weeks. For the first time, he felt like he could breath. The truth was out there and now it was no longer in his hands, it was in Midoriya's. And that was okay. It was okay. He was... okay. 

Izuku, however, inhaled sharply with widened eyes. He could have sworn that his heart stopped beating all together. Here Todoroki was, confessing his feelings to him, and all Midoriya's mouth could do was go dry. Come on, Izuku! Say something! He opened his mouth to speak but ended up gaping at Todoroki for what felt like 10 years. If his mouth wasn't dry before, it most certainly was now. Words went limp on his tongue and no matter how hard he tried, nothing came out. Say something, he pleaded with himself, desperation painfully evident in his eyes. 

"It's okay if you don't feel the same way. Don't feel obligated to say you like me back," Todoroki said in a chillingly calm manner. His voice was nearly devoid of emotion, except for how it cracked slightly on the last word. Midoriya closed his mouth and puffed his cheeks out slightly. He rubbed the palms of his hands together in thought while keeping intense eye contact with Todoroki. His heart was racing impossibly fast and he couldn't bear to tear his eyes away. 

The taller of the two of them looked away after a few more seconds passed. It seemed clear that Midoriya wasn't going to answer. Todoroki sat there, feeling like a fool. 

"Here, I'll make it easy. Forget I said anything." He stood up, tears burning the back of his eyes. It's fine, it's fine. You're fine. What did you expect? He turned his back to Midoriya and squeezed his eyes shut, taking a shaky breath. You're fine, you're okay. You'll be okay. "I'll see you tomorrow."

His eyes stung with tears and tiny droplets beaded along his lash line. Had he been too hopeful? Did he really, truly believe that Izuku wanted to be anything other than just friends? Idiot, you really fucked this up now. 

It's okay, you'll be fine. Izuku will be fine.

Nothing is fine! He probably hates you now! You screwed up everything.

I didn't! He'll understand! Izuku is understanding.

This is what you get for fucking up your friendship. You put your needs before his. You're selfish; self-centered. No wonder he didn't answer. This is what you deserve. 

Todoroki ducked his head and made a beeline for the dorms. He refused to cry. Tears could make all the empty threats they wished but he would be dammed if he cried over a stupid rejection. It was nothing, really. He was being overdramatic. Just overdramatic. He would sleep and the next day he would be fine. It's not like he just put his and Izuku's friendship in jeopardy. His only real friendship in jeopardy. No. Because he's not that stupid. Shoto Todoroki is many things but he's... he's not that dumb. Right? Oh god, please let him be right.