ᴄʜᴇʀʀʏ ʙʟᴏꜱꜱᴏᴍꜱ • ᴛᴀᴇᴋᴏᴏᴋ 【✓】

｡♡16♡｡ Abstract

Jungkook's perspective

Life is all about changes, some are acceptable and some are unacceptable. All the good changes that adorned my behavior were a present by him but now I was going back to my dejected self. It's like my intovercy was creating walls around me, making me more suffocated than ever.

Mom and Dad said that this would take some time to get used to it but I had no one to help me get through it. I had no one around, no one to teach me new things and meanings like Taehyung, no one to motivate and accompany me like Jimin. All I had was lone days and some treasured beautiful memories.

Jimin and I were in touch, frequently sending letters or sometimes calling through telephone. We missed each other's presence but our conversation was still enough to send warmth and comfort to each other. His giggles on the other side were enough to warm up my cold days.

The city, Seoul, it's big, massively gigantic and crowded but I still felt alone and cold as I was only surrounded by strangers. The university is big and beautiful. There's a lot to learn here but I couldn't be courageous enough to utter a word to anyone here though it's been good six months here.

I indulged myself in studies, my only motive of being there and besides this I tried to see the world around me in a different way that how days and nights changes, the world keeps spinning around, there is a rush every in the surrounding but I can feel the stillness inside of me, like a pause. We are not always successful in coping up with the surroundings.

We don't want everyone and everything to fit in this world but we just want someone and something to fit with us to make a whole new world, where there is no rush, no stillness but some things to explore and feel.

I have never felt this connected with nature ever before maybe it was an alluring escape from every miseries.

~

“You see this Jungkook? How I held your hand so that we can move along at the same pace and can be together. Same this nature is related to everyone, we are connected like our hands so that we can move along with nature.”

“And you know why we have gaps between our fingers? - So that someone can fix their fingers between these gaps like how I did with yours.”

~

I looked down at my hands, reminding me that I was incomplete and empty but this foolish heart would never even dare to fill it by someone else rather than him. My heart was stubborn and I was helpless. His words, every lesson was still treasured inside my head. And he was the reason that I felt connected to the nature.

This is why finding myself between nature was like a shower on my sorrow to wash it away. The trees producing breezes with every movement of their leaves was something very precious. Never knew that the sober movements of air would become my messengers.

I was walking on a path that was leading me forward but my memories always collided in bringing me backwards and I was just being crushed in between them.

This rush was suffocating. I needed some relief. I found my escape by being quiet on the outside but loud on the pages. Yes, writing was something I felt comfortable with.

I was also a literature and language student, trying to pursue my career and future in something I found comfort in because this was where I belonged.

I tried my best and tried hard to achieve whatever I wanted to achieve through my studies because I was not the one to manipulate my past but I had the opportunity to manipulate my future by focusing on my present.

I found distractions, a lot of them and they were clouds of thoughts around me. My eyes would always linger on the wrist watch in my hand which was supposed to tell me the exact time but it always failed in doing so, instead it would take me back in time.

The clouded thoughts were actually more dangerous than it seems. I always wondered where he would be, what he would be doing? What if he sends a letter to me again and this time with an address but I would not be able to receive it, Does he know where I was?

And the most painful question, will we ever meet again or not?

I was hoping, I had faith but sometimes I felt so done and tired that the exegration made me want to scream and cry. I had no one to assure me about this and I was losing my hope.

Is this how love feels like? Pain and only pain? Separation and longing? Why is it so hard to reach someone that is supposed to be here with me?

No one could answer any of my questions and I was back at it again. Lost in my thoughts, away from the world and locked inside the walls of intovercy because in the end no one could understand.

I had no other way but to continue however life wanted me to because at the end of the night all I was left with was only sorrow.

•°•°•★★★•°•°•

Don't worry, they are going to meet definitely and soon.

Hope you guys enjoyed reading it!