Cold At Dusk

Fourty two

"Kamsi, you should make your hair " Mark said the next morning.

Kamsi just came out from the shower. She sat on a leather padded seat and applied her lotion. She ignored his statement and combed through her hair which was very soft and long enough to  touch her shoulder.

"I'll tell Mama to contact her hair dresser " He said.

She looked at him. He was lying prone on the bed with his hands under his head.

"Why didn't you say anything last night? " She asked. She walked to the wardrobe,  removed the towel that covered her nakedness then wore her clothes.

Mark still lay on the bed in silence not knowing the reply she was seeking . She walked back and sat on the bed, looking at him, waiting to counter whatever he said.

"Say anything like what? " He asked, his eyebrows slightly raised.

"You were there. It is not even her business what I do with my hair yet you stood there smiling like she was commending you "

"That's why I'm asking you, what did you want me to say, Did you expect me to raise an issue over a hair talk? " he asked  then sat up to lean against the wall.

"Hair talk? " Kamsi asked, taken back.

"Yes, hair talk. If she actually thinks that way alot of other people would too"

She laughed, "You see that's your problem. It's only infront of me that you are a man"

"Kamsi, don't talk to me that way " He warned as anger seeped in slowly. She rose from the bed and dragged the seat she sat on earlier to face him. He picked his phone up and looked at it instead.

"You want to be perfect in the eyes of other people but should I invite them to your home? " she asked, "When other people stand up for their wives what you did was to keep silent. Cat will cut that your tongue you did not use last night "

He now glanced away from the phone to look at her. Most times  when she displayed her anger or any sort of emotion, it always seemed out of place. Like a  hungry child that cried when shouted at saying  it was the shout and not the hunger that made him to cry.

"Each time I pointed out your wrong to you, did you do something about it? " Kamsi asked, resting her elbows on her knees as she leaned towards him. "Don't you sound stupid to yourself that you want me to make my hair because your uncle's wife said so?"

He stood up quietly and walked to his box which was still on the table. He found a polo then wore a short over his boxers.

"I see you are out to insult me this morning, you  can leave your hair. afterall, it's yours" He said, putting his feet into his slippers.

Kamsi hissed, "I will, it's my hair "
He looked at her and shook his head with a sigh.  "And please bring food up for me when you are coming back " She added, without looking at him.

Kamsi's  food was brought up, not by Mark  but Michelle. She came in with the tray of food balanced on one of her arms then she walked to the bed and dropped it.

"It's breakfast in bed, my queen " Michelle said, laughing. Kamsi laughed too,  without much strength.

"Your husband begged me to bring it up for you. " She said. She settled on the only seat in the room.

"Me, I'm hungry. I don't even want to hear about some bald-headed people now" Kamsi said, digging her spoon into her  porridge plantain.

Michelle laughed hard clutching her tummy. "Where's that coming from "

"The annoyed part of me " Kamsi replied and after that she told Michelle about the previous night and Michelle's reply was to laugh.

"like why are you even taking her to heart?" Michelle asked, "This is not a new thing na"

Kamsi continued to eat her food as she replied, "I am just angry. I want to be angry. You needed to see how meek  this Mark that behaves like war and fire was"

Michelle laughed, "Please what's happening,  where are you getting your inspiration from ?"

Kamsi spooned food into her mouth, "My daughter is talking to me "

The night of that same day, Kamsi sat with Michelle on the trunk of one of the cars parked outside,  looking at the sky, listening to the sound of the crickets and hugging cold away with one duvet.

"Mee,"Kamsi called still looking at the sky. "Do you think it's possible to ever finish loving someone?"

"I don't understand," Michelle said, shifting in the duvet to adjust it.

Kamsi sighed, hoping she could explain how she felt.

"Is it possible to love someone, stop loving the person, start loving again, stop loving again until you can no more love again?"

"Is this about some baldheaded someone? "

"Just answer me."

"I don't know. The psychology I studied doesn't even understand what you just said. I just know that I try hard to keep what is mine."

"A woman asked the rheotorical question online." Kamsi said.

She knew Michelle did not believe her  and she gave herself away the more. "What if you don't know what you are fighting for?"

Michelle's arm went over Kamsi's shoulder, rubbing a hand on her arm through the duvet. "You do know. You are fighting for your peace - whatever is your peace . You are fighting for your integrity, respect and sanity. It doesn't always have to be a person."

Then silence blessed the night. Michelle's words sank into her and floated around her ears.  There were things  she  needed to fight for and there were things she needed to fight against like  the cold that was beginning to unwind around her heart.