Reflection (Kim Namjoon x Reader)

Chapter 29

Seokjin and his husband were still at work, but he told you to still come over because his teenage son, Jungkook, was, and the kid loves Namjoon like an idol. When the boy saw the unconscious Namjoon, he almost cried. He had spent the morning cleaning out the guest room for his favorite person to rest in. After changing back into your regular clothes, you sat on the bed and wiped Namjoon's forehead out of habit. It was the only thing you can do for him now, and it helped to calm you down as well. Taehyung and Yoongi took a nap on the couch after Jungkook fixed them up some lunch and the young boy, after checking in on you multiple times, went to play some video games in his room.

You focused your attention back to him, hoping he would be okay. Who were you kidding, this was all your fault. He was happy with you and halmeoni, and you betrayed him by revealing his identity to him and to the world. Now he's hurt and he'll blame you forever. The thought pained you greatly, twisting your heart and made you cry. You dropped the rag and covered your face. Tears stained your cheeks and the bedsheet.

In his slumber, Namjoon felt the bed shaking ever so slightly. He also heard muffled crying, it was the first time he heard someone crying since he'd been asleep. He doubted that anyone would cry for him, his parents wouldn't, and certainly not Hye Soo. He must be imagining it then, which is why he didn't want to wake up at first. It would be seeing the same thing, the stern disapproving look on his parents' faces and Hye Soo's apathetic one. He grew bored with them, and eventually, they won't hurt him anymore. He tried to tune the crying out, but it grew more urgent until he couldn't deny it anymore. Carefully, he lifted one eye. It was not the hospital room. His parents weren't here, and it wasn't Hye Soo sitting on the bed with him.

It was your hair, your soft hands, your tender cry. "Y/N," he gasped quietly, his voice came out weak and didn't reach you. His finger twitched as he moved, his hand, and touched yours, pulling it away so that he could see your face fully. You froze, unsure of what's real anymore. But when you saw his eyes and how focused and alive they were, your shoulders dropped and you cried harder. "Y/N," Namjoon said again, this time, with more concern. "Why are you crying?"

"Because you got hurt," you answered quietly. "And it's all my fault."

"No, no, no," he shook his head. He held your hand tightly to his chest and for a second, you forgot about the separation, you forgot about his fame, about your mistake. For a moment, it was just you and the person you like. But everything rushed back all at once and you yanked your hand back to your side. Namjoon blinked. "Did I do something wrong?"

"What? No of course not," you objected. "I am the person who did the wrong thing. When I found out who you were, I should have told you. I should have talked to you first before making the decision myself to call your family. And I didn't know that you were struggling in that awful home. I threw you back there for you to suffer. I'm so sorry." you cried. "And now you're more hurt."

Namjoon moved without you noticing, and his arms diligently went around you as he pulled you to his chest. "I'm not mad at you, Y/N, I can never be mad at you."

"But, but..."

"Ssshh, you couldn't have known."

"But I thought you were mad that I sent you away."

"I was a little bit upset, not mad," he soothed. "I was upset that you sent me away because you didn't like me. I felt like I was a burden to your life and when I got into my parents' car, your job was done."

You gasped quietly and pushed yourself back from him. "Namjoon, you were never a task for me, or a burden," you sniffled. "You were and are someone I care about greatly. You were the first outsider I let my guards down around, and I wanted nothing more than to be around you at all times. But when I found out who you were, I realized that we're two different people and I will never be good enough to stand by your side."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're a well-acclaimed author while I'm just a nurse from a small town. I'm so unbelievably plain while you lived in this extraordinary world with your spectacular presence. I don't know if I can make you any happier. And besides, your parents wouldn't accept me and you have Hye Soo."

"Who I don't love," he interrupted. "I don't care about what my parents think, they never took my happiness into consideration. Y/N, I remember everything and I remember that I was miserable with life. I was basically waiting until my time runs out so I could hide somewhere where people won't be able to reach me. But that was before meeting you. And now, I want only you to see me. You make me so utterly happy that I don't know how to handle it."

"Will I be enough?"

He chuckled, "Y/N, you gave me a reason to live again, you gave me a purpose for writing, you gave me a reason to look forward to the future. And I can't thank you enough."

"You deserve to live happily."

"Y/N, do you like me?"

"I-" You didn't know what to say, what was the right answer. You were afraid your answer would be the catalyst to something horrible and he would be taken away again.

As if he read your mind, his hands cupped your cheeks. "I'm not going anywhere now that you're here."

"I love you, Namjoon."

He wasn't surprised by the answer, but his heart still did a flip. "I love you too." He closed the distance between your foreheads and you two stayed there in silence for a few minutes, just before the door opened and Jungkook tackled the man he loves.