[Shadowhunter] Imagines

I can't - Raphael Santiago

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You are a newly turned vampire and refuse to drink blood.

Characters involved: You, Raphael Santiago, Elliot O'Connel

Trigger warning: blood, death

Request: //

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"Come on, you need to drink. It can't go on like that. You haven't eaten since three days now. It's a wonder you are still alive." Elliot said, while holding a cup of warm blood right in front of your face.

The irony smell made you tear up and almost caused you to vomit. You couldn't do this.

"I'd rather starve." You brought out with a dry and harassed voice.

Elliot sighed. "You will. Today will be hard. Tomorrow it will probably be over. You'll die. And Raphael will come back to his dead fledgling."

Not having the energy to talk, you just thought about your sire Raphael. He 'saved' you last minute by turning you into a vampire. You signed the contract afterwards and the clan came away with practically killing a mundane.

They all have been good to you. Not imagining bloodsuckers to be so empathic and nice, you were most certainly surprised.

Especially Raphael and Elliot were worried about your health. You always had trouble drinking blood. The first time you drank it, right after crawling out of the grave, you puked everything out.

After all the events set and you had time to think, you felt guilty for taking the blood of a human. Of a person of your former species. Just the thought of drinking someone's life-fluid made your stomach and also your heart upset.

Back as a mundane you were vegetarian, even almost vegan. You decided for yourself that taking the life away from a living being, wasn't the right way of surviving.

And now you lived as a monster. As a bloodsucker. That took someone else's life or a part of it.

Elliot placed the cup on your nightstand. "I'll come back and check on you in some hours. Give a shout if you need something."

He gently put his hand onto your shoulder, but even the slightest touch felt like the breaking of a bone. Life truly sucked.

After Elliot was gone, you changed your position onto the floor. You weren't the person to spend the whole day in bed. And eventhough you just sat down some feet away from the former spot, you felt a little more productive.

Elliot was your literal clock. He came to check on you every 3 hours. So you knew that 3 hours have passed when someone knocked onto the door. It was always him.

Not giving an answer he entered some knocks later. "You're still alive. That's good. Raphael will be back in some hours. We'll see what he has to say about all this."

You didn't believe that you had the power to hold up some more hours and you knew, you actually didn't want to.

By now you were sure that you wanted to just pass away. It would be the best for everyone.

"Hey, Y/N, I'm talking to you. You okay?" He knelt down in front of you onto the floor.

Raising your voice hurt a lot. "Just let me alone. Please. I don't want more."

Elliot slowly nodded and left with a sad "It was nice to get to know you, Y/N."

Your whole body ached but you already brought the state of bloodlust behind you. From now on the pain in your stomach, heart and veins intensified, your throat and fangs burned and your muscles were tensed.

But the fear of your sire Raphael was the worst.

Some hours later it knocked again. It has probably been three hours and you also thought that you made your point clear to Elliot.

But the one who knocked didn't knock again, he just entered. It was Raphael. Your sire with dark hair and eyes wore a formal suit and a tight black button-down.

You looked up at him. He closed the door and went towards you, kneeling down.

"Why for god's sake did Elliot have to call me on a clan meeting, saying that my fledgling is dying?" He sounded calmer than expected. You expected him to scream and be angry, but he seemed to understand.

"I know that it's hard, but you have to drink. That can't be it. Come on, try it. Starving is the worst death we could experience." He grabbed into a pocket of his suit and pulled an IV-bag full of human blood out.

Your stomach almost repelled by the vision of the dark fluid.

"I can't..." was all you could bring out.

He sighed and raised his eyebrows. "If you don't want human blood, would you drink animal blood?"

Again you shook your head, now almost falling over to the side, eventhough you were sitting down and leaned on a wall. The dizziness became worse per minute.

"If you don't want animal blood, will you drink mine?" You thought he was joking and a smile appeared on your face. 

But he was dead serious.

"Drink from me. At least once. Then we'll talk and we'll figure out a solution. But if you don't drink within the next hours, you'll fall into a coma, and not a nice and calm sleeping-beauty-one, I can tell you that."

Not being fast enough to say something against it he stood up and undressed his jacket, throwing it onto your bed. Then he rolled up the sleeve of his shirt.

Your eyes began to get heavier and you knew you were about to die again.

Raphael squeezed himself between you and the wall. Not being strong enough to hold your upper body up, you rested against his chest. He felt so warm in contrary to you.

Biting into his wrist he ripped open the veins and blood began to pour out. Your fangs popped out and tears ran over your cheeks.

He pressed the wrist onto your mouth and a second later you found your fangs deep in his flesh, without even realizing it.

Drinking his sweet honey like blood, the pain in your body started to ebb away.

Embracing his arms with both of your hands, Raphael gently stroked the hair out of your face. "Drink, fledgling. Tomorrow will be better."