The Whitlock Girl (A One Direction Fanfic)

Searching

Lillian's POV

The house was empty when she arrived, which was unusual. Usually something would be happening. Pushing the handle of my bag down into place, I left it in the foyer and wandered around the house, my heels clacking on the marble.

"Hello?" I heard the faint voice of my mother in the dining room, her voice muffled behind closed doors. She seemed frantic.

I heard something heavy drop against the wooden table and heels clicking in a hurry across the marble floor. In an instant, the large mahogany doors flew open, and my mother's arms wraped tightly around my thin frame, "Lillian!" She seemed relieved, but it only took a moment for all that to go away.

"Where the hell were you?!" My mother hardly ever cursed, so I knew she was being serious.

"I needed a few days to myself. Okay? All this wedding planning...and I-I" I busted out the tears, letting myself fall into the crook of my mother's shoulders. Her hand rubbed tiny circles in my back.

I wish I could tell her why I was crying. Why I didn't know who I loved. Why I was such a horrible person...I wanted to scream my problems to the world. But a lady doesn't do that. When a problem arises, she stays quite and fixes it without anyone seeing. It was all about poise.

"Shh, Baby, Shh. I know, I know. Wedding planning is tough," Her hand now was smoothing my already straight hair, something she hadn't done since I was a kid. It was nice, and in her embrace I calmed down.

I suddenly felt tired. Tired of everything. Tired of Niall. Tired of Blake. Tired of Wedding Planning. I silently wished I hadn't messed it all up in Paris..but I did.

"I'm going to go take a nap." She nodded, but as I turned away, she sighed, "Don't forget, we're having dinner with the mayor tonight."

Yay. Blake's Dad. What the perfect way to end a horrible past couple of days. Yet, I guess I deserved to be miserable for what I did.

With low shoulders, I climbed the staircase, my heels an echo in the hallway as I made my way to my room. Once in, I threw my bag on the bed. Millions of thoughts rny through my head, but only a few leaped out at me.

What had I done to Niall?

What had I done to Blake?

Who was I anymore?

I didn't even know the girl who's reflection I stared at. She looked like me, but she wasn't me. She was the girl I used to be. The girl that stared back was dressed in fancy clothes, hair in a perfect state, perfect complexion, shoes to kill for. The ideal, generated girl whom was perfect.

This wasn't me. I wasn't perfect. I cheated with another man. I was falling in love with another man. I needed to escape for a while.

Turning on my heel, I hurried to my closet, scouring it's contents for what I searched for.

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So! I know this is kinda super fracking short, but lately Ive been super busy. Finals and such! And all the holiday madness! Plus I haven't been able to write lately, for anything. I'll try and update again within the next week.

Love you lovelies.

-Shelby.