The Scenic Life

Chapter 16

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When I was in school, I was the only girl who hasn’t been asked out or been in a relationship. I pretended that it was cool, but internally I just wanted to have someone so that I could stop all the stares burning into me like an arrow shot from a bow while on fire.

I liked a boy when I was 15, he used to sit next to my bench in school. I think he was the first boy I ever fell in love with me. I used to listen to everything he had wanted to tell me, and the best part was; he wanted to hear what I wanted to say to.  he was perfect to me.

But then of course, we didn’t indulge in anything more than that. He shied away from me after school ended, all of the conversations I started on calls were met with one word answers. I then realised that one words could be heartbreaking too.

My first love broke me with one too many one word answers. And surprisingly, vihaan broke me with one word. A sorry. An apology. An apology for resting his hand on my thigh. An apology for locking hhis eyes into mine. An apology for wanting to kiss me.

And I feel like a cacophony because I wanted him to kiss me.

After that incident, we kept our distance form each other. He stayed away from me, which I was grateful for. Because I don’t know what I would've done if he were in a one metre radius of me.

When we went back to the hotel, I didn’t meet his eyes. I changed my clothes in bathroom, removed my makeup, and then went to sleep. Facing away from his side. I didn’t sleep peacefully that night.

We needed to get to another town, called Chittorgarh the next day, which resulted in a very awkward drive. But at least we weren’t alone, we had our driver driving us there.

I think we had made a pact within ourselves to not talk about the incident. Or, what I really think Is that vihaan forgot he almost kissed me at the club, and had gone back to hating me.

I'm sure it was the latter one.

Now, we had been in Chittorgarh for two days. We were supposed to go somewhere else yesterday, but due to harsh weather we couldn’t go to the Chittorgarh fort.

Now its day three here, and the awkwardness is still there. We haven't spoken to each other except to ask to pass the salt at the dinner table, or just to ask where we are going now.

We are the the Chittorgarh fort, the palace of Padmavati, trying to finish off the work in this scorching midday heat. The history of this palace has always intrigued me. A palace encrusted with the voice of sacrifice by thousands. For love. For respect.

I pause my shoot for a while, and just try to absorb the history of a thousand years. My body is present on the ground leaning against the wall, but my mind is faraway, trying to find the  moment where I had felt happiness and wasn’t introduced to trouble Immediatedly after, tried to the moment where my happiness wasn't just a calm before a storm.

My peace is momentarily shaken when I feel my shoulder shaking by a hand. A hand that belongs to vihaan.

I shrug myself away from. “what?”

He rolls his eyes at the attitude I packed in my 'what'.

“complete the work, don’t dawdle.”