Take Me To Church - l.s. AU

Ch. 4

I stumbled behind Harry a little dazed. Since alcohol was still running threw my system it was hard to keep up with his fast pace. Also considering his legs were so much longer than my own. He didn't stop either, he kept fast-walking practically dragging me. His face was emotionless as he dragged me across the street back to the range rover. He unlocked the door, and dropped my hand getting in the driver's seat. I just followed suit and sat in my respective place.

As my door shut with a slam, the air instantly grew beyond thick. I put my hands in my lap and just looked around under my lashes. My eyes fell onto Harry. He was gripping the steering wheel, his knuckles almost white. His forehead was rested on the wheel, too. His eyes shut tight and he was breathing deeply.

Was he okay?

I knew I wasn't...

I wanted my voice to come out better, but it came out shaky and low. "H-Harry?" When I said his name he opened his eyes but didn't move. "Are you... Are y-you okay?" He let out a long breath before turning to finally look at me. His eyes weren't as cold, but they weren't the nice warm green I liked.

"I'm... M'okay..." I nodded. He looked me over before his irises grew soft. I looked away hoping he'd drop it. I guess he got the idea when he went to turn the car on, and began driving away.

I looked to the clock on the dash. It was only about 12:40 am... Wow. I didn't have to be home for a while but I wondered if Harry was actually taking me home.

After a little time of driving I realized that no, he wasn't taking me home. He seemed to be going a different direction. I just decided to let it happen, so my mind wondered.

Calum... What if he said something? If he did apparently him and his mother would leave our church... And if Calum doesn't tell anyone his mother sure would. We've known their family for a while, and his mother couldn't keep anything to herself for the life of it... And if she told someone, it would find it's way to my mum or dad... And if that happened holy fucking... No! No no no no!

I didn't notice I was panicking. I didn't even notice the car had turned off and Harry had gotten out until he was standing outside the passenger door. He opened it and unclipped my seat belt making my body turn until I was facing him.

He just shook his head no a few times. "Baby... No please don't cry.." I was crying?

I guess I was because he gently whiped away my tears with his thumb... Damnit why was I such a mess? I was so frustrated with myself a little, and hurt from what Calum said...

He spoke softly as if I would run away. "Tell me," he whispered and I had to strain to hear him. "Why're you crying love?" I just shook my head and looked away. "Please?" He begged. "Tell me and I'll do what I can to help, okay?" I still didn't look at him, but I made up my mind that I'll talk...

"So um..." I sniffled. "My dad's the priest at the Doncaster chapel. And uh... That guy? He's a member of the church." I saw him nod out of the corner of my eye telling me he was following. "Well. Because I'm the 'preacher's son'," I put in air quotes. "I can't be anything close to gay. It's been burned into my mind that it's bad and not the way of life. B-but... Since meeting you I'm... I'm not so sure that..." I couldn't even finish my sentence. I didn't want to.

Harry's fingers found their way under my chin as he moved my head so I was looking at him. Just like before he rubbed away the wetness from my cheeks. "Not sure of what?" He asked gently.

I took a deep breath. As soon as I said it aloud it would become real. All too real. But I just looked Harry dead in the eyes. They were no longer any traces of anger or zero emotion. They were back to the comforting green.