Always, You. {Billie Eilish Fanfic}

Chapter ten

Izzy's POV:

***

All I want to do is kiss her, but that isn't fair. I've been gone for years, I can't just waltz back into her life and confuse her with everything I bring along, all my baggage.

"I-I" I stutter and clear my throat. Moving away from Billie's face, inviting air into the space between us.

"I need to go, I'm sorry" I quickly blurt out.

"Excuse me sir, can you please stop the car" I ask the driver as I move my body to face the door, gripping the handle to release it open. 

"Izzy, wait" Billie starts, she reaches for my hand but the SUV has already pulled over to the side of the road.

"Bil, I can't" I don't look at her whilst I step down from the large car.

Billie moves to the edge of the seat and gets out too.

"Stop, just wait a second" I start to walk down the dark street, Billie in tow.

"Isabelle" a low growl slips from her lips, and I know better than to not acknowledge it. Authority laced with her words.

I turn around, stuffing my hands in the pockets of my jacket, to pull out my gloves. I finally look at her, it breaks my heart. Her green hair moving in the wind, the chill dusting a pink scatter over her cheeks.

I wish I could run to her and put my fingertips on her cheeks, caressing her milky skin, whilst tenderly kissing her plump lips.

Instead, I stay in my place as she walks up to me. I see the look in her eyes, hurt and confusion, I don't want this either but it's for the best, right?

"Please stay" her voice breaks.

Fuck this is harder than I thought.

"Get back in the car, it's freezing and you don't even know where we are" Billie states looking around at the streets.

I giggle at her. I've lived here for four years, I know where I am, she doesn't know where she is though.

"I know where I am, upper east side" I tell her.

"Fine but it's still freezing, get in the car" an exasperated tone. I see her starting to shiver.

"I think I need to walk and clear my head. I'm sorry, please just go back to the car. We'll talk later" how did things get here, I wonder.

"Whatever. Leave, again" and before I can open my mouth to reply she has walked away and back into the SUV.

I asked for this.

I watch the car pull away from the curb and start driving.

I stare at it thinking about all the days and lonely nights, the memories come rushing into my mind, the times when all I wanted was her. The pain and hurt I endured thinking one day we may be together again, and the most cursed and horrible thought that I think of more than I should; One day we could be living our happily ever after.

But now, I'm watching the girl of my dreams driving away from me.

The clench in my chest making it harder for me to breathe, the pain travelling to my stomach making me feel like I could throw up.

I think about getting a taxi considering I'm on the upper east side and I live in Soho but decided against it. I start walking as the hot tears warm me up, pathetic right?

I bury my chin into my cream scarf and trudge through the wet streets of New York.

***

Billie's POV:

"Drive" is all I say once I re-enter the car.

"Miss Eilish, are you okay?" My driver asks as the car pulls away from the curb.

"Fine, just take me to the hotel" I reply, pulling my phone out of my pocket.

I hover over the contact for Finneas but decide another call is more important.

"Hey babe" I hear the voice that has helped me through so much.

"Hi" I whisper in reply, my hand running through my hair.

I feel horrible for what I'm about to do, especially over a phone call but I don't know if this can wait till I get home.

"Is everything okay, how was snl?" He questions in a happy tone but with some hesitation behind it.

"Trent" I take a deep breathe. My stomach in knots, I hate hurting people.

"It's Izzy, isn't it" no question in his tone, more matter of factly.

I squeeze my eyes closed, and for what feels like the millionth time today, tears run down my face. I small sob escaping my lips.

"Hey, hey baby it's okay" his voice soothing my hurt.

"I'm-I - I'm so sorry" I stamper out.

"Bil it's okay, I'd by lying if I said I haven't been thinking about this happening since you told me about her. The way your eyes light up when you reminisce with Finn or how your face sinks when you hear someone with her name. I knew you and I had a time limit, and I guess it was kinda selfish for me to continue when I knew that"

How can someone be so kind

"Nothing happened" I quickly reassure him.

"I know you wouldn't do that to me Bil" he sighs.

"And I am sorry for doing this on the phone, it's just - you deserve so much more than I can give you and I will always be so grateful for the time we shared, but I can't keep lying to myself" tears still streaming as I choke out my words. The car pulling into the parking garage of the hotel.

"Everything will be okay, I will never regret what we had. For what it's worth Billie, I think we can still be friends, maybe not right away but some day" I smile at that.

"Thank you"

"Of course, now go get your girl" we say our goodbyes and I don't tell him how I won't have Izzy but I feel relief in knowing I'm not stringing him along anymore.

I get out of the car and up to the hotel room, this time I do go to Finn. Standing in front of his and Claudia's room I knock softly and almost instantly the door opens, Finneas doesn't get a word in as my arms go straight to his waist and I begin to sob loudly with all of my emotions be set free.

Claudia walks around us to close the door and wraps her arms around me too.

We stay up for hours as I recall tonight's events with both Izzy and Trent.

***

A/N:

Phew 😅 glad that Billie ended things with Trent. Now to see if she gets the girl...

Although really, Izzy fucked up not Bil, right?

Thanks for reading, don't forget to vote ❤️