War in Katipunan

Kabanata 39

KABANATA 39.

Spica’s unsaid words, unspoken feelings and unshed tears.

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To My Luthor,

The tables turn and I’m now on the ground. In this sea of tears and ocean of memories, your peaceful eyes still lingers. I may not seem like it, but I still crave for your touch and warmth. The years without you, tears me apart. I want to scream your name in every way possible. But I have no voice to tell them to you.

We are miles apart and no voice can reach your ears. The only hope that’s left is the fact that we’re under the same skies. We might not inhale the same air but at least we’re under the same sky, same stars and same sun. The time may differ but not my love for you. Seasons may change but it can never change the affection I have for you.

The tragedies that happened to me tore my heart in to small pieces. But my Faith held them again. I am slowly rebuilding myself. I want to be whole again. You came to my mind every now and then, but I can’t do anything but to pray for your safety and wellness. I might not be beside you, but know that you’ll always be inside my soul. You are a part of me.

You are a part of me that when you left, I also lost a part of me. When I slowly lost everything, I also started to lose myself. I am longing for your embrace but you were nowhere within my reach. You were like a missing puzzle piece. Ikaw ang kulang saakin.

What makes me sad is, the love we almost had. Almost, but not quite. I want to say that I need you more today, but the words just won’t come out. I want to cry, but no tears are left. I want to tell you my feelings, but I was so broke. I can’t love you if I’m broken. I can’t love you wholly if I’m not whole.

How cliché is may sound but, I want to be whole again. I want to be whole so that when the day came that I’ll meet you again, I can love you wholeheartedly. Without regrets, without fear. Just me and you, and God with us. If the universe will let us to be together, I want to worship God with you. Because the Lord gave me a new heart without hatred and fear. He gave me a new heart full of love. He gave me a new heart to love you.

Wherever you are right now, please know that I will always be proud of you. My Luthor, even if we’re not together, my heart has always been with you. Mahal kita…

Sincerely,

Your Spica

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Maraming salamat sa lahat ng nakaabot dito.
This is the last chapter of War in Katipunan.
I hope I satisfied your hungry minds.
And if not, I promise to be better.

Wakas na ang kasunod nito.
Muli, maraming salamat :)

-Ella Dianne