Chapter 22

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Conor's POV

I've got a new spring in my step as I walk down the pavement in central London, a spring I haven't had in what feels like years.

I'm happy, free from the dark cloud that had been circling around my head for as long as I can remember.

The sun is shining brighter than I've ever seen it, almost as if it's reflecting my current change of mood.

I already know where I'm headed having looked it up many of times before I decided to actually go to the address.

Was it rude to turn up unnoticed?

When it came to everyone else, yes, but I know Olivia won't be anything but happy for the fact that I've actually left my flat willingly for once.

That's why she's amazing. Why she's the exact person I need right now.

I stop outside the green double doors; For pre-booked classes please ring bell.

Without hesitation I quickly press the golden bell on the wall, the doors unlocking pretty much immediately.

"They are almost finished, just take a seat"

An older lady sat in the reception points over to a couple of chairs that had been placed along the wall.

"Sorry?"

I smile, a genuine one for once, shooting a quick look at my phone when it buzzes in my hand.

"The children's class is almost finished. Are you not here to pick up a child?"

She looks up from the computer screen, her thick rimmed glasses on the tip of her nose as she stares me down from behind her desk.

"No I'm- I'm here to-"

The sound of a door opening followed by young girls giggling catches my attention before I'm able to finish off my sentence.

"Well this is for pre-booked classes only, so if you don't have a child to pick up I suggest you put one foot in front of the other and leave before I call security"

"Mrs Horris, what's going on?"

That voice; her voice. It's enough to make my heart stop in my chest, enough to make my lungs stop functioning properly. But not in a way that's painful. No, if I could I would let her do that exact thing to me each second of every day.

"Miss Thompson I think-"

"Conor, what the f- blinking hell are you doing here"

The lady I now know as Mrs Horris looks over at me in shock as the girl that's been keeping me alive these past few weeks breaks the silence.

"Well I-"

I stutter, not really sure why I'm here to be honest. All I know is that I'd missed her when I went to bed last night and I'd missed her when I woke up this morning. I wanted her to know that things had gotten better, that she had made things better.

"Miss Thompson please elaborate why there's an unknown man stood in my reception at three in the afternoon on a Tuesday"

Olivia looks me up and down, a slight frown on her face as though she can't find the right words to actually explain the current situation.

"I've come to take Olivia on a date and I'm really sorry if I've caused you any inconvenience, that wasn't in any means my intention"

I look the petite brunette straight in the eye after I've said that, watching her expression change as her brain catches up with the words I'd just uttered.

Yet there's no smile growing on her lips, no excited glint in her eye. Instead there's a frown covering her face, a frown that instantly made the anxious bubble in my stomach come to life again.

Instant regret

I sigh, pulling my hand through my hair as I watch Olivia shoulder her gym bag, pushing her way past me in the small hallway and exiting the building before I manage to react.

"What the fuck Conor?!"

Her makeup free face has a light sheen of sweat covering it as she turns around in front of me on the pavement, a few strands of her hair having escaped out of the high ponytail.

"Are you gonna speak or?"

The tone of her voice is new, harsh even. Something I'd been yet to experience when it came to her.

She'd always been calm and understanding, none judgemental and just overall a person who I liked spending time with.

"I- uh"

I stutter once again, taking a few steps closer to her only for her to take the exact same amount away from me.

"Why the fuck are you here?! Conor, you're a hot, attractive, rich as fuck popstar that I've fucked a couple of times. But you turning up at my work like this is fucking creepy, okay!? You understand?"

She throws her hands out, the words I'd wanted to say for some reason not leaving my mouth as I watch her stood all worked up in front of me.

Neither of us were angry people, I'd gathered that from the first time that I met her. She never really lost her temper, never really raised her voice towards anyone. Yet somehow am I the one who's brought that out right now. Somehow I had hurt yet another person who meant a lot to me, of course I had.

"I'm- I'm sorry"

I've never been a person who stutters and never easily get offended. But today all I seem to do is struggle with my words and feel sorry for myself.

I look up at her, the dark lively eyes I'd been obsessed with since the first time I saw that picture in her tinder profile, staring straight into my blue ones.

Yet the anger I'd expected to see in them isn't there, instead all I see is the soft smile played upon her lips, a soft and understanding smile, a smile only she was able to pull off.

"I'm sorry too"

She sighs, adjusting the bag she still had hanging over her shoulder.

"I care a fucking hell of a lot about you Conor, I really do. But this wasn't what I expected when I agreed to come over a few weeks ago. I don't have time for a boyfriend right now, fucking hell I almost haven't got time for myself alone, nowadays. I look like shit and all I wanted was to get home and into a nice warm shower, have a glass of wine and watch a crappy film on TV. So when you said you were taking me out on a date I lost it, I lost every ounce of sensibility and patience and I'm truly sorry you had to endure that. I just- I don't even know what I'm saying anymore"

It takes me a couple of minutes to get my head around the words she'd just said yet once I've done that all I can do is nod. She was right, she'd never signed up to this, she'd jumped straight into it without having been given the terms and conditions beforehand and that was all my fault.

I'd taken advantage of her, used her to numb my own pain and she'd just accepted it, given her all to me when I needed it the most.

"Come here"

I open up my arms hoping with my whole being that she's going to accept the hug I'm offering her. Yet I don't have to worry for long, her small frame only seconds later colliding with my hoodie covered chest, her arms wrapping around my neck as I embrace her.

"You've showered"

She looks up at me after a couple of minutes of silence and all I can do is nod, smiling down at her as a light of pride shines from her face, a pride I'd only previously seen worn on my mum.

What had I, Conor fucked up Maynard ever done to deserve her?

I shake my head at the thought, knowing that without her I most likely wouldn't be anywhere near where I am today, she quite literally pulling me forward against the endless stream that for so long had been dragging be backwards.

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