butterfly; tsukishima kei

20

i sloshed through ankle deep puddles as freezing, bone-chilling rain poured down. the rain pelted the ground with an ominous sound and i shivered, not in coldness, but fear. i started wondering, when did everything went wrong?

the sudden news that came by, the sudden turn of events in just a week that pass by. i clutched my shirt tightly, not caring about the stares i got since i'm used to it already. as i approached the place, the same familiar name of it made me on the edge of tears again.

my whole body went even cold upon being hit by the air conditioner inside. before any nurses or doctors can assist or ask me, i sprinted towards the elevator and muttered a curse word as i saw it closed. i head towards the stairs and ran as fast as i could, not paying attention to each drip of droplets of water falling on my skin to the ground.

it was painful when i got there and i hurriedly opened the door of the room. i saw uncle sitting on the chair beside her bed, beside her once again unconscious figure. the only difference is that this time, she looks much more weak and there was a low chance of her surviving.

everything was just so wrong after that day. my father has been fired from his job and he continued to find for another one. however, i stopped him since i didn't want him to end up like my aunt. so i worked after school, anywhere, it doesn't matter how hard it is as long as i'll get paid.

i knew exams are coming, i knew that those projects are needed to be passed soon. so after working late at night, i would try and finish them before reviewing the other lessons i couldn't review the other day. i barely got enough sleep, but i didn't complain since i wanted my father to rest more.

i was so stressed to the point that i would break down in front of my assignments, counting the money that i earned, but it wasn't even enough. i would cry myself to sleep and wouldn't stop thinking about my aunt who's still unconscious in the hospital.

my teachers noticed the sudden drop of my works and mood. they started asking me what was wrong and what was affecting my studying. i always lied since i didn't want anyone to get involved or to add more reasons for my bullies to bully me. even kenma and kuroo had been questioning me, noticing the loss of weight and color that i have these days.

but as usual, i would paint a smile on my face in order to cover the pain behind that art.

"i'm so tired." i would mumble to myself each night. the more the exams are near, the more i worked harder and stayed awake late at night. i didn't have enough energy to protest at the money that i've been earning. i just applied to more available jobs that i could do.

even if i have to deal with the bullies, i never really averted my attention to them anymore. i would always be lost at my thoughts and would often excuse myself at them. i would accidentally sleep at class and if the teacher's very strict, then i'll be sent to detention.

i wanted to cry so bad, but all my tears had been wasted to wrong situations and people already.

everytime i feel like giving up, i would visit my aunt in miyagi, crying in front of her unconscious figure, begging for her to wake up. i would look at my father who has become old and weak now. i would look at my friends who tried on cheering me up, despite knowing that it might not work. i would think about my mother and remember her words.

and i would think about him.

as i got out of my aunt's room, i quickly walked towards the seat outside and sat beside a boy, who had his face buried on his hands. i didn't pay much attention and broke down, crying silently as i stared at her room. i couldn't help but just sob beside a stranger, i feel so weak and pathetic now.

i feel like anytime soon, i might give up already. and i'm scared of the future, i'm scared of the other situations that i'll be facing soon. so i did nothing, but just cry all my emotions and stress out.

"crybaby."

a voice appeared beside me and i lifted my head up to see tsukishima's face. his usual smirk wasn't there, his face was just blank as he stared at me.

and there was... tears streaming down his face.