Only You |Kylo Ren

Chapter 29

Elora's P.O.V

It had been decided that from now on, I'd be Commander Kylo Ren's assistant. It was sort of like his First Hand but not specifically like that. My duties were simple compared to what anyone else would think the job consisted of. I had to accompany him on all trips and meetings, it meant that I actually had to pay attention and listen to what was being said. 

I had to fight for and alongside him on the battlefield, it's not like he needed it. The man was a whole foot taller than me, he was like an impenetrable wall when it came to the battlefield. I also had to put all of my attention on everything he was too busy to worry about. It was all new to me since I was usually the one in control with someone by my side.

It almost felt like some kind of arranged marriage. I devote all my time and energy into something just to get security in return. I was never praised for what I did or even thanked sometimes. I just learned how to do instead of asking questions and that was ok. 

I just wished that he wasn't so cold to me all the time. We never had conversations anymore and any time I'd talk to him he just... Runs away? It bothered me, I wasn't used to being alone and it was all terribly depressing. I decided that sooner or later I'd have to get to the bottom of things because I couldn't just work for a man who had no interest in conversation with me.

I stood behind the mysterious man at the observation panal as we waited for the weapon to charge up. The bright red light slowly but surely illuminated the entire galaxy, ready to strike out and destroy any resistance allies. This moment made me happy that I never decided to make a pact with the resistance. They'd never have the weaponry to do this and I never would've met Kylo... Well not on good terms anyway.

I straightened out my long black dress and looked around at the many First Order workers around us. They all watched as if they were seeing a spectacular light show. Although it was a phenomenol sight, countless children, women, and men were about to be murdered in cold blood. I couldn't say this out loud though, this was my only chance to finally belong somewhere and I wasn't gonna let my morals mess it up for me.   

The light suddenly got even brighter and it broke off into four different sections. One by one they incinerated each planet. I couldn't begin to even fathom how many people were just killed. I thought about how many existences were just simply wiped away. Their planets burned and turned to ash in space. 

Everyone cheered and clapped around me. I smiled and joined in the celebration as well, I didn't want to be left out. This is who I was now and in order to fit in I acted just like everyone else did. Kylo turned to face me and I smiled at him, "Another victory for the First Order, Commander." I said as I walked next to him. He stared at me for a few seconds and then quickly turned on his heel to leave.

Normally, I would've let him go and not think anything of it but I was tired. I was tired of feeling like I didn't exist to him. It felt as if I was some maid, that I was only here to do his bidding and to leave him alone. Well I refuse to let this childish phase go on any longer, I was owed an explanation and that's what I'll get.

I quickly followed Kylo all the way into his room. "What's wrong with you?" I asked him with my head cocked to the side. He clicked off his mask and placed it on his kitchen table, "I'm not sure what you're talking about." Kylo began taking off his robes leaving him in just a black shirt, black pants, and his boots. "You're just acting weird. You haven't talked to me at all, even when I try to make a conversation with you. You just ignore me and I'm not taking it anymore!" I lost my temper and raised my voice.

"Look, you are just my assistant. We have no other ties and there's no reason for us to conversate other than about business." He shrugged, "No other ties? Then why did you try to kiss me a week ago?" I asked as I looked him in his eyes. I could tell that he was speechless and didn't know what to say. "It's not like it's an unknown thing, Ren. You wouldn't have done all that you've done for me if you didn't have feelings for me in some way." I crossed my arms over my chest and awaited for him to answer me.

He quickly walked over, his tall figure towered over me as he looked me up and down. "You want to know the truth, Elora? I do love you! I hate myself more and more every day because I love you when I know I can't have you." He shouted and started circling the room. "I've always loved you. From the moment I set eyes on you after all those years on Ahmorada. I loved you when we were on that forsaken beach! I loved you when I saved you from Tradion!" Kylo now stood still as we made eye contact from a few feet away. "Snoke, he knows I love you and that you'll do nothing but deter me from my path! These are the reasons I've been cold, Elora." A tear escaped his eye and ran down his cheek.

I couldn't believe all of these things he was saying to me. I knew that Kylo favored me but to love me? He slowly walked over with tears in his eyes, "You're the only one who knows me... Who knows I'm not a monster..." he whispered and gently cupped my face. I looked into his eyes and slowly wiped his tears. He melted into my touch and before I knew it, his plump lips were against mine in the most passionate of kisses. 

I had waited a long time for this moment. I never knew how much I yearned for him until I got a taste. It was like all the cheesy stories will tell you, a million firecrackers popped off in my head and the sparks were just flying as free as can be. Our lips moved together in sync, we were two puzzle pieces that completed the whole picture. It felt good to finally be this intimate with Kylo and I never wanted it to end.

We pulled apart after a few minutes and stared into each others eyes, we were breathless as can be after what had happened. I stroked his cheek and softly smiled, "Ben... I know you're in there. You have to be..." I whispered lightly for only him to hear. He stopped directly in his tracks and it was if his chocolate brown eyes full of love drained out to be just black with anger and pain. He pushed me off and started huffing while walking around the room. 

"What's wrong?" I asked frantically as I watched him walk around in circles while hitting himself. He took out his lightsaber and ignited it, the bright red light illuminated the room and I was sure that this would be my end. "Get out!" He yelled in a fury and he started slashing everything in sight. I was scared and not sure of what he would've done if I stayed. As Kylo screamed and destroyed his room with his weapon, I ran out and went to my room in complete tears.

I suddenly started rethinking every single decision I've made up until this point.

What have I gotten myself into?