trigger warning I'm very sorry, guys. I love you all
Also, I kinda want to write some more, so if any of you write and want to do a collaboration, I'm open and you know how to reach me! c:
Frank;
I wake up with my back pressed against Gerard's chest and his arm wrapped around my waist. A Gatorade bottle is still hanging loosely in my grip and the TV is still on, displaying an episode of South Park that I haven't seen before.
I carefully turn my head, not wanting to disturb Gerard's slumber, if he is sleeping, of course. When I get to where I can see Gerard's face, I see that his eyes are open and focused on mine. "Did I wake you up?" He asks, moving his arm so that his hand is rested on mine, clutching onto it.
I shake my head, my eyes closing in the process, "No, I just kind of woke up."
He looks relieved to hear that and relaxes again, sighing a little.
"Um.. Is it alright if I ask you something from a while ago?" I ask quietly, hoping he doesn't get mad or upset with what I'm going to ask.
"Yeah, go ahead," he replies, turning the TV on mute so he can hear me better. I nod my head, encouraging myself to ask. So, I roll over, laying on my back, and turn my hand so he's holding it properly.
"Okay, um.. That girl, um, why were you with her for a little bit?" I ask shakily, preparing myself for the worst.
"Can we not discuss this?" He asks, a sigh following it.
"Why not? I'm not asking for much.. I mean, you were staring at her ass, you were all over each other in the hallway, and she was over here clinging onto you like a life source. I just want to know, I want to make sure that she isn't going to take you away from me." I regret saying the last part because now I sound like some needy, clingy, freak. He isn't my boyfriend, sure, but I just want to know that he isn't going to go after some slut because I'm trying to focus on school.
"Please, I just think we should leave that alone. I know that you really don't want to hear it, I know that when you saw us and she was clinging on me that it was the last straw, I'm not stupid Frank. I don't want to bring something up that caused you to... To do that. And I don't need to tell you the story when I can assure you right now that I am not going to go after her. No one will take me away from you." I'm so confused. Why won't he just tell me? It can't be that bad, right? I mean, did they fuck? Oh my gosh. They fucked, didn't they? He doesn't want to tell me because that's what happened!
So, with that disgusting and unwanted thought placed in my head, I throw the blanket back and get up, leaving him on his bed, probably very confused. I walk to his bathroom and go in, locking the door behind me. I sit on the counter and put my face in my hands, prepared to cry my heart out. I know I can't prove that they did, but what is there to make me think they didn't? I know how Gerard is, or used to be, or whatever. I'm well aware that he has stuck his dick in a lot of places, and I'm willing to bet that her vagina was one of them. I don't even know why I'm getting so worked up, we weren't, and aren't, dating. Maybe it's just the jealousy.
"Frank, come out of there," Gerard says, knocking on the door loudly.
"No, just go to bed," I call back, feeling tears well up in my eyes.
"No. Is this because I won't tell you what happened?" He asks. Close, very close, Gerard.
"No," I answer shortly, pulling my knees up to my chest.
"Then what is it?" He asks, sounding exasperated. He sounds like he's close to just giving up and letting me sit in his bathroom. I'd like it that way, being alone has always been something that I've liked, but then again, so has being in the presence of Gerard.
