𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐞 𝟏𝟔, 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟗
(901) 786-4767:
I know you probably still hate me..I don't blame you but at least give your mama some money Iz
(901) 786-4767:
You know I appreciate what you do for me, just please.
The bitch wasn't talking about shit. Madison left me last night, a couple of my dealers got busted, and ain't no cooked food for me to eat. I was pissed already.
She did this all the time and me constantly thinking back to "she's my mama" I would give her the money she asked for. But this time? She bad the game fucked up. I wasn't giving her a cup of my piss let alone a few hundred.
Madison said she'll be back, I stayed home just so J can be here when she got here but she wasn't here yet. I had a feeling she wasn't gonna be. That "I will always love you" bullshit she gave me just let me know she wasn't coming back.
She could've kept it real wit' me. Madison been dramatic and shit but last night, she was extra dramatic. She acted like I straight up knocked the shit out of Keisha. I should've, but I didn't.
It's to the point ion even know if I want her to come back with how quick she be to leave.
𝐌𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐧
Sitting in the car, outside of my dad's house my nerves were driving me crazy. My fingers fiddled, my legs bounced up and down, my breathing was a little unsteady but I couldn't turn back now. Something wouldn't let me.
"It's okay Madison.. it's okay." I tried to coach myself. I sat in the car trying to steady my breathing before getting out.
I walked slowly up to the door because I honestly wanted to chicken out.
I silently prayed after ringing the doorbell. The door opened and there stood my father. He looked like he hadn't shaved his hair or his face. His eyes looked tired. He looked tired, dead almost. It was a scary sight to see. His face looked relieved when he realized who I was. He probably couldn't recognize me with the lash extensions and short hair.
"Madi.." He started. His raspt voice made me tears fall and he pulled me in. He hugged me tightly like I came back from the dead.
"Hi dad." I managed to get through tears. He pulled me in more so he could shut the door then let me go to get a full look at me.
"My god, you look beautiful Madison."
"Thankyou." I sniffled. I looked around at the place and it was a little messy. "What have you been doing dad?"
"Going crazy about you. Where did you go?"
"I caught a bus to Memphis..life has been treating kinda alright." I laughed a little.
"Who do you know in Memphis?" He asked, completely confused.
"Well I knew no one. I met this guy the same night I arrived there and i've been with him ever since."
"A guy?"
"Yeah. He's my boyfriend."
His eyes widened. "Boyfriend?" I nodded my head.
"I promise dad, he's a good guy. Well he's a bad boy but he's good to me." I pulled out my phone to show him a picture of us. I gave my dad the phone and he studied the picture a little before giving it back to me.
"How is Memphis for you?" He sat in his chair while I sat at the dinning room table.
"Started off horrible but it's definitely changed around."
"Horrible? What happened?"
"I was beat up the day I came by some girl, I seen four people murdered, and I was raped. But Israel handled all of that."
"Doesn't sound like a good boy to me." He chuckled.
"Well you would know huh?" He slowly put out his cigarette and cleared his throat.
He looked at me then at the floor. "Madison i'm sorry. I really am. I really can't even explain why I was so angry all the time. It was never you."
"So why? There has to be a reason why you put me through hell for five years dad. I have scars on me that not even the human eye can see and those are the ones that will never go away."
"I know Madi, trust me I wanted to kill myself thinking of all the reasons you left. I was so proud of you for what you did. Even though it caused me harm, you were strong." He broke down. Seeing him this vulnerable was the first time i've ever seen him like this. I never seen my dad cry.
That's how I knew he was truly sorry for what he did to me. A part of me is past it but the small percentage is just wanting to rip him open right now. A very small part.
"Dad you know I could never hate you." I got up to hug him. "We can start over." I mumbled.
"I would love that Madison." He cried on my shoulder.
-
"I've been getting this feeling mom.. that I should talk to him so I did."
"God, I couldn't believe we even had such a emotional conversation like that. I didn't all I wanted to. He was broken enough."
I sighed. "And then with Izzy, I don't know ma," I rolled my eyes in frustration cause I had no idea what I was going to say to him. "he's probably done with me for good. I hope not though."
I checked the time on my phone and decided to wrap it up. I had to be back in time for me and Izzy to have a real conversation before he left the house.
"Okay I have to get home mama." I kissed my fingers and placed them on her tombstone. "Goodbye for now. I love you."
I walked through the grass to my car and sped off. I really hopped Israel didn't give me a hard time. I didn't want to cry anymore today.
-
Walking in the house I smelled nothing but pot. I knew Izzy had to be in the house smoking somewhere.
As I turned around from locking the door, he walked out of the show room. He took his blunt from his mouth and just starred at me. His aura looked like a shadow. I don't know.. it was like a angel. No wings but it was just like someone I had never seen before.
"Izzy.."
"Where you was?" He walked closer to me, like he was floating.
"Izzy what is wrong with your bod-
The moment I said that it's like the things I was seeing went away. He looked at me weird and kept taking pulls from his blunt.
"You know Madison I really ain't feeling how you keep leaving."
"Keep leaving? Izzy this is only my second time."
"Exactly, which means you keep fucking doing it."
"Izzy I really don't want to fight with you. I said I was coming back and here I am." I walked over towards him. I wrapped my arms around his skinny waist and poked my lips out for a kiss.
"Get on my nerves." He grumbled, pecking my lips hard.
"Ow babe."
-
