Football players are assholes. I know; I'm related to their king. My older, and annoyingly overprotective, brother Jake is the star quarterback at Santa Cruz High School. I love him but hate living in his shadow. Everyone worshiping the air he breat...
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The week crawled in a horrible blur. I moved with my eyes glazed over. My parents held fuzzy conversations before and after school. Class lectures diminished in my ears. Words and numbers on my homework ran together no matter how hard I squinted. The football team babysat me in a burly, testosterone-laden, greasy fog.
A continuum of 'what if' questions circled in my brain. What if Logan did nothing? What if Jake found out? What if my reputation was ruined again? I couldn't have cared less what anyone outside my close inner circle thought of me, but I preferred to avoid being the school's social joke of all gossip again.
Every minute that passed this week aged me a century. Simultaneously, graduation day stretched further away. I kept to myself, only speaking to answer questions in class. To minimize the chance that Jake knew about my feelings for Logan, I sat through the cross-country team's practices with Harper. If football practice was boring, watching a herd of tall, thin-legged boys clomp around the same track on repeat was a snoozefest. Maybe that was why I dropped the F-bomb on Harper.
"Feelings?" she blinked as if I'd spoken another language.
"Hush," I whispered and tucked my head down. My cheeks burned, and I squeezed my clasped palms. "Yes, feelings. I caught feelings for Logan."
For now, I wrapped them in a thin veil and guarded them close to my heart. I liked Logan. A lot. Girly crush-level, embarrassing but true. His giant butt wedged into my brain, and I missed him. These weren't dangerous feelings but new. Having them without a safety net of assurance was scary. If Logan decided to fuck me over, ruining Jake's game for revenge, it would leave me disappointed, but I didn't want to believe that's who he was. His silent mode wasn't helping. Now I knew why Jake hated mine so much.
"Wow. I'm happy for you, Elle. Fuck, what are you going to do about..." Harper's voice faded, and her eyes shifted to the team practicing on the far end of the field. "For once, I can't fucking wait for the game. Thanks for bringing the fireworks."
"No fireworks. And if you say a word, then I'll disown you."
She pulled up the corners of her mouth. "Exactly how does one disown a friend?"
"No idea." I huffed a short breath. "I'll make you sit next to Jake every time you come over for dinner."
"Let's got get hasty here. And relax, I don't need another excuse not to talk to Jake." Her smirk faded into a soft smile. "I hope Adonis treats you well. Because the moment he fucks up and hurts your feelings, I'm turning his avocados into guacamole."
"I know." I smiled at my clasped hands. "He knows, by the way. About... you know."
Her head snapped to me, and she gasped. "Knows knows? Fuck, how did he react?"
How could anyone react? I shrugged one shoulder. "It's not his place to fix me."
"Never thought you were broken." The guilt in her eyes contrasted with her words.
