agony. |darth maul

one.

1

"Grand master Yoda, I apologize."

Kin is awkward, her arms crossed as she tries to look casual. It's not working, and she knows the elder can read straight through her. The effort was to be appreciated, she could imagine.

"Nothing, you have to be sorry for," he speaks and Kin bows her head in respect, "Understand the consequences of leaving the order, you must."

"I do, master, this has been a well thought out process." Kin recalls in her head the nights she had spent on the floor of her tiny room weighing her options.

"Than leave the farm by tomorrow, you will." Kin nods, "May the force be with you, always."

"May the-"

Darkness. The hologram disappears and without the blue light Kin is left in the dark. She rugs at her uniform- she can't remember wearing clothes the Jedi order hadn't given her. She hated the Agri-Corps uniform, the cream colored tunic was itchy, the cream pants plain and the heavy brown fabric used to carry crops was far too hot just to wear around the field.

Kin left the communication room, head still slumped and arms crossed. What was she going to tell these people? Her destiny lies somewhere different? She doesn't even know where she's going to go, her plan was flawed.

"Madraykin! Who were you talking to?"

Kin turned to her friend, a blue skinned, yellow eyed Pandoran. You didn't see those often, and definitely not in the Jedi order. She was a rarity to say the least.

"Grand Master Yoda, Celeste." Kin huffed, sounding embarrassingly worried. Celeste didn't seem to get it, so the human continued, "I'm leaving the order."

That seemed to have an effect because everyone in a mile radius stared at the girls. Kin pulled Celeste closer to her.

"Leaving the order?" She whispered. It wasn't extremely rare, but uncommon. Especially for someone Kins age, 19 was barely into womanhood.

The younger woman nodded, "I can feel it. I need to leave."

Celeste shook her head, "What? No! I thought you loved it here?"

A pained expression hit Kins face as she didn't know what to say. She didn't hate it, daily meditations, cultivating the fields, peaceful life. It was so easy. There was just something in Kin that screamed for to leave. To go elsewhere.

"The order won't take you back."

An elderly human man, Kin didn't know his name- there were hundreds of Jedi at this farm. She had always seen him, he sometimes led meditation.

"Sir, I understand that," and she bowed to show respect, just as she had been taught 10 years ago at the temple in Corusant. "The force is leading me elsewhere."

The old man simply nods, "Then don't let anyone stop you."

***

Packing. Kin didn't own many material goods- Jedis never did. All she had was her books, spare pieces of clothes and the lightsaber she had been given as a youngling. She hasn't used it since then. She tossed it into her bag anyway, as means for protection.

There were no tearful goodbyes, Jedi didn't form attachments. Not like that, instead no one spoke to her as she left the gates of the farm. Celeste wasn't there, Kin knew she was crying, she couldn't say goodbye.

Then it was the walk.

Kin knew it would take a day tops to walk to the transport station on this planet, but did a day feel long to her. She trudged along until she saw it- the tiny station for the tiny planet.

"Hello?" Kin asked. There were no droids on the farm. They were simple people, all they needed was the force. Kin didn't really know how to act around them. "Hello, sir?"

The protocol droid came to life and Kin smiles, the little beeping noises excited her. She wondered how many droids she would run into on Coruscant. Sure, she had live there until she was 9, but younglings rarely left the temple. It would be something she's truly never seen before.

"I would like a ship to Corusant, please." She tells the droid meekly. He replies quickly and she's being lead to a starship. "Hello there, little one."

She taps on the R2 units head. It doesn't seem to like that and makes a shrill noise at her. She doesn't speak droid, that's going to give her hell.

"He said not to touch him," the protocol droid translated for her as it left the ship. Kin sat in the passenger seat, crumbled up into a little ball. This was it.

yes this is all written in my notes app at 3am and no I don't proof read ❤️