Tidal Moon (Renesmee & Jacob)

Chapter 1: Stay...

I furiously tossed clothes into my black backpack, my quick movements almost knocking Jacob against the wall. I was on a dire mission to pack as many things as I could fit into the backpack as quickly as possible, which was pretty quick considering my speed. I stood on my tip-toes as I grabbed the smaller black designer bag that Aunt Alice had gotten me last Christmas in which I kept a generous amount of cash tucked away. More than the average person would need to live on for a lifetime.

"Ness-" he began, his husky voice panicked but I could sense that he was trying to come across as calm and logical. I could see pain twisting his face in every which direction, my outburst right now is completely unlike me, but what does he expect? You cant just tell someone "oh hey by the way I imprinted on you awhile back so we are kind of soulmates-" without expecting them to take it at least a little bit hard.

"Do not speak to me!" I all but snarled. I heard a soft giggle from the doorway. Rosalie, my beautiful aunt, stood there with her arms promptly folded across her chest, leaning against the door frame.

"What did you do now, dog?" She taunted.

"You have no room to talk!" I yelled. Her face twisted from the venom of my words and hurt spread softly and slowly across her face. "You knew, all of you knew! And you just decided that I didn't need to know that I essentially have no choice!" I didn't realize I was screaming until I heard multiple people shift downstairs, flinching at my anger. Mom and dad aren't going to take my decision well, but I don't care. Dads probably informed them already of what I'm doing, so I don't need to explain myself to any of them. Aunt Rose looked from Jacob and then back to me before sauntering off and down the stairs to no doubt tell the family that I had absolutely lost my mind.

"I love you.. I've always loved you and I've always been what you've needed. But now it's shifted..." he trailed off trying to explain away the information that had just uprooted everything that I thought to be true about my life. "I don't just love you like a protector anymore. It's more than that and I know you've felt it as well.. Nessie please. Stay." He was begging now, slowly taking steps towards me with his arms reached out as if he were yearning to wrap me up in them and make all of the hurt go away.

Venom flooded my mouth, I'd never hurt him, dogs aren't necessarily my favorite food. I winched at myself for giving him the cruel nickname that Rose had always called him. The venom in my mouth subsided, but my words burned him more than it ever could have.

"I'm sorry you've wasted your time on me, but I don't love you. Honestly, you disgust me Jake." I felt a heavy pang in my chest as the words escaped my parted lips. I would never tell him that I loved him too, because I wasn't sure if that was my choice or a result of his imprinting. Everything could be fabricated for all I know. What do I even know anymore?

His face fell as did his arms which now hung limply at his sides. "But I love you..." he almost whined.

"I hate you." I didn't mean it, even if I wanted more than anything to actually mean those words. My words were definite and hung in the air like a thick smoke. He nodded and without a second thought he jumped from the bedroom window and out onto the ground outside.

I stumbled back to the bed and sat down, warm tears spilling down my cheeks. Even though I'd stopped aging, some things about me frustratingly stayed human. For example I flush easily, which always makes my mom laugh because she says it reminds her of her human self who was incredibly awkward and clumsy, but I couldn't imagine my mother as anything but the strong and graceful vampire that she is today. I also cry when I'm mad or sad, which mom says is also a lot like her. I wish I knew more about dads childhood, but he doesn't even remember much of it.

I listened for Jacobs footsteps until they turned into the heavy sound of his paws pressing into the earth. I hurt him. I really did it this time, didn't I? But why would he keep this from me for so long? I quit aging 14 years ago, but tonight on my "21st" birthday that my parents absolutely insisted I have, he decided it was a good time to tell me that he imprinted on me when I was a child and that now that I am older it means that we are going to be together? Okay... maybe he didn't say it like that. But still...

I sighed, wiping my tears away with the backs of my hands. I have a friend in Atlanta named Candace, a vampire like me of course, it'd be hard to keep human company. I can survive off of human food or animals, and I've never taken a life. But I also limit my human interaction because the smell is undeniably delicious and inviting. I had hastily called Candace and asked if I could come stay with her for just a few weeks until I figured something out that was more permanent. I was leaving Forks, and I was leaving tonight.

"Please..." I hadn't heard my mother enter the room, but when I glanced over she was right next to me on the edge of the large bed. Dad stood in the doorway, seemingly trying to let mom take the lead. "I didn't understand either." She reached out and brushed her cool hand against my cheek, capturing a stray tear that I had yet to wipe away.

"And yet you did nothing about it." I accused, flinching away from her mothering touch.

"Ness, I tried to kill him." She said, her face breaking into a beautiful and humorous smile. I could tell by the seriousness in her eyes that she wasn't lying.

"So I don't have a choice? I've never had a choice, have I?" I concluded angrily, springing up.

"My love, you have always had a choice. That's not how it works. If you don't want to be with him you don't have to. And no one would force you. That's a promise I can keep." Dad said taking a step towards me.

"I'm leaving." I said grabbing my bags and pushing past him. I walked down the stairs and into the large living room where the rest of my family sat on the multiple pieces of furniture.

"Where will you go?" Carlisle asked. I'd tried to call him grandpa, but he always jokingly said it made him feel 'old'. My face softened.

"I don't wanna say because I don't know how long I'll even stay anywhere that I end up going." I said.

Alice sprung to her feet and hugged me, slipping a set of keys into my jacket pocket. I could tell that the keys belonged to the Aston Martin. "I understand, take all of the time you need. But don't forget to call your favorite aunt at least five times a day." she said in my ear quietly so that no one could hear. I could see a hint of a smile on her face as she walked to sit back next to Jasper. If anyone would approve of this it was her. She always encouraged me to go out and find myself. I am going to miss her so much.

"Goodbye." I said and sprung out of the door before anyone could ask me any more questions or try to convince me to stay. The engine in the Aston roared to life and I was going well above any legal speed limit long before I reached the highway. I heard a broken howl coming from far behind me, but instead of making me stop, it only encouraged me to press the gas pedal harder. The GPS said it would be a two day drive, but I knew I'd be there in much less than that. I took a deep breath of the fresh night air and tried to relax as I drove towards the unknown.