𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫; mattia polibio

032

june 27 2021

so i have no clue whether or not i'm going to see hector today or if we're gonna text or facetime. i have no clue. sadly i spent the whole day with mattia yesterday cause he hated seeing me sad so he took me shopping and we ate a lot. let's just hope this time i don't fall madly in love with him for the third time. i still need to change hector's contact name but i have no clue what i'll make it, i'll figure it out later.

wednesday the whole gang is going to canada's wonderland and i'm scared but also excited. i'm really hoping i don't go on the leviathan or else i will end my life, nobody will hear from mia rivera after that. my phone buzzed and it was hector, i'm nervous now.

hector 🧸

hey

hi

can we talk here

yeah sure

so how do i start

when did u and her yk like start out

before her and mattia broke up
we started talking may 25 and took it from there
i knew what i was doing was wrong but she was jus so kind hearted and amazing

wow the 25th

yeah..
her and mattia broke up june 1 so then we started going out public but avoided any fans
the first day of vancouver she was still kinda sad abt the breakup so i comforted her and that's when we got more closer
when we got back home from vancouver, we kissed
june 15 i asked her to be my gf at a carnival

so you've been cheating for a month

two months and a half

and yet u were complaining abt me cheating

ofc i still loved u and didn't wanna risk losing u

u had lauren

she wasn't the same
u are way different from her which i loved so i kept u with me

u weren't using me then

no
never

this is a lot to process
when did u realize u didn't love me

when it was soccer championship
when i kissed u, there wasn't a spark like there usually is
it was hard for me to comprehend that i didn't love u anymore cause i loved u a lot

how do ik ur not lying

i'm not lying mia
i did love you
genuinely

what did u do when u realized u didn't love me

i cried a lot
for hours and hours
the day of our anniversary i was hoping i would have that spark again but nothing
i'm sorry for the pain i put u through

it's fine
it hurt a lot cause i loved u a lot but i need to learn to cry, yk let it hurt then move on
i can't be stuck on u forever

anything else u wanna know

was i not good enough?

u were mia, u were good enough

so why did u choose lauren over me

i was too scared u would leave me for mattia so i cheated to save the hurting but all that did was hurt me seeing u in so much pain