Catastrophe

Sinking Ship

inside me slowly, an intense emotional war is brewing,
the meaning of trust? from opening up; I am eschewing.

you say I! a pessimist? no! I was a roseate, and infallible,
it leads me nowhere, naive, I was nothing but gullible.

used and stabbed by those i trusted, just because I cared?
unable to loose them, I accepted the pain, I was scared,

in darkness, I see a light, a hope, you were my anchor,
holding to you, I let all go, for my own soul, I was a bettor,

helped me to lean on you, you collected all my tears,
accepted my flaws, my misery, neglecting all my fears,

with your help, what is trust, I learn the meaning again,
piece by piece, I rebuilt myself, mended, forgetting that pain,

ephemeral happiness, it simply vanished like a smoke,
broken worst than before, beyond repair, a shallow rock,

your words are like spear, digging deep in my soul and heart,
you are not to be blamed, I know, yet I'm being pulled apart,

I was on the fault, letting myself again, to believe in trust,
inferring, I can disclose my turmoils to you, infact I must,

I believed on a facade, shattered, it's slipping from my grip,
betrayed by most trusted person, I'm nothing, but a sinking ship!

Author's note:
in wreck, yet gathering all pieces of her soul again; she stood up proudly infront of everyone, no one noticed a hand on her back, giving her support, only she felt it, accept it, trust it. Blissfully when she closed her eyes in relief of companionship, that hand suddenly pushed her forward and disappeared. Now she's nothing but broken beyond repair. Hands approached her to support her but she cut them all of without a blink!

Listening "Scared to be lonely" by Dua Lipa and Martin Garix.

15/09/2020, 4:30am