trepidation | h.s

part seven

Harry Styles

Lydia and I spent the rest of the day after the beach enjoying each other's company. We went for a walk, and made dinner together. It was such a peaceful evening. This entire weekend was so needed, especially after the break in incident.

I've tried to keep that out of my mind, but I still don't know if it was a coincidence or something darker.

Something gang related.

I've been trying so hard to stay out of the gang related issues. Louis took my place as the leader, but I know that me stepping down doesn't make up for the people who still want revenge on me.

There's still people out there who want me ruined.

Xavier and my mother are included in that narrative, unfortunately. I still don't know where they are.

I killed Samuel, the leader of the Phantoms, back when I was chained up in the hospital basement the night Daisy was born. Since then it's been quiet, but I know they're waiting for the perfect time to strike.

And that's what kept me on my toes every second of every day.

We've gone untouched for eight months. I still help Louis work with the Kings. We hold the occasional meeting, making sure the numbers are in our favor if something ever does happen.

But, thoughts like that can't haunt me everyday. I'll drive myself insane.

So I just try my best to focus on the positives.

Im surrounded by people I love.

I have the most beautiful child in the entire world.

I'm married to the one person I ever pictured spending my life with.

Things are good, from that perspective.

It was around 9 pm when the sun started setting and Lydia and I were relaxing in the bed, watching one of the Mission Impossible movies. I wasn't sure which one it was, and honestly I wasn't paying too much attention and neither was she.

We had started sharing a joint, much like we did last night except Lydia had a few more puffs.

And she was so zoned out now.

She was never big on smoking, and she didn't particularly love when I did it either. I honestly didn't do it as much after I met her except for the occasional party.

But the difference tonight was that she wanted to try it again. Last night, she passed right out after taking one hit. She didn't actually get to experience any sort of high.

"You don't have to smoke just because I am, baby." I said to her when she brought it up at dinner.

"I know. I want to do it." she replied.

She coughed after the first couple of hits, still learning how to inhale the smoke properly.

I was right there to take care of her, so she knew that there was nothing to be afraid of or worry about.

Now she was staring at the tv as her body relaxed into my side. She was wearing a black shirt of mine along with one of my large red flannels and my boxers.

I rub my hand along her hair, brushing it back from her forehead with my palm.

"Your hands are really soft." she mumbles.

"Yeah?" I chuckle at her words.

She nods. "Mhm. Like warm little blankets."

"Thanks, babe." I laugh quietly as she snuggled into me.