If he only had a choice

The line that can't be crossed begins to fade.

I wake from my nap, well wake is not the right word, I feel as if I barely shut my eyes but its nearing 6 o clock and I need to face detention with Malfoy.

Im dreading it, I have no idea what he's going to say, who he has told, will he tell the death eaters I'm here? Who I am? He can send me to death with one simple mention of my name. I never should have called him a coward, I should have just let him be and he would let me be.But its too late for that now.For the first time ever I am genuinely afraid of him, he holds real power over me, something that can destroy my world, that can destroy Hogwarts.

I enter the room to find Snape and Draco already there, they whisper at each-other, what I can only imagine is about me and harry. They haven't even noticed I've arrived.

I slam my bag of the desk demanding attention.Snape glares at me then speaks,

"finally you decided to show, you're lucky I'm feeling generous right now so I wont deduct any points, yay.Have..fun" he smirks and evil twisted way and walks off, hearing him murmur spells on the room, he wasn't bluffing he really is keeping us in here until we talk , but what about.Theres no way we will resolve this feud.
After an hour of silence I finally speak as he's clearly it going to.

"Have you told them, the death eaters, if you have you have to tell me I deserve to know if I'm being hunted down this very instant!" I shutter at the thought, trying to sound strong but only coming across as weak.

"no of course not, I may be a death eater but I'm not a monster, I don't willingly choose to be bad you know, if I tell them then the whole wizarding worlds in danger not just you and mr potter," he looks at me with painful eyes, he looks so..damaged, maybe he wasn't so bad after all.

"otherwise I would have loved to deliver the news" he scoffs proud of himself again, I cant stand him, he's so infuriating, I can feel my hair boiling again, but I don't try and stop it this time.

"you are a monster Malfoy how can you even joke at a time like now , you didn't choose to be bad are you kidding? you practically bow down to him do all his dirty work with a big sense of pride" I yell at him fury in my eyes, taking a step forward at each thought I have.

"Bow down? What am I meant to do?! Tell him no and get me and my family killed, I am not a monster , I have no choice! you filthy mouthed freak!"he spat lunging forward taking only 2 neat strides to come face to face wth me.

"you disgust me you proud piece of shit" , I take a step forward inches from his face again I see my hair blazing its light and heat against his pale white skin, highlighting the anger in his eyes.

"take it back you fowl git" he steps back like a coward, pathetic.

"you coward"

"shut up Lola!"

"no its about time someone told you how awful you really are"

"you think I don't know? you think I don't already hate myself for the life thats been set up for me? You think I don't wish I could choose what's right over saving my own ass?" He scowls his frustration forcing his eyes to gloss over.

"no I don't think you do, I think you love the attention form the dark lord , you love the power! you love it just like your father" i return his tone.

"I Said.Shut.Up" he launches at me grabs my arm and pulls me in, I attempt to escape his grip but he's stronger than me.He shoves me across the desk and I fall across the chairs landing on the ground. A look of anger and shame on his face, but he doesn't know any better, this is how he has been raised to communicate.

"Is that all you've got Malfoy, I'm surprised you didn't just use a dark curse, play dirty like all other death eaters huh? I try to say fiercely as I stand up, my body shaking.

"i'm not like those people okay? I am not evil I'm a good person, you don't even know me" he grabs me by my collar shoves me on the desk hovering over me forcing me to stare into his piercing grey eyes which are on the brink of dropping tears.

"What's wrong Malfoy, gonna cry?, don't act so tough and then begin to cry, not very powerful of you is it", I can feel my body trembling and a shiver goes up my spine forcing me to shake.

"Says you, look at you you're trembling over me  just being in the same room as me makes you quiver and hide, you're weak!" His grip gets tighter and he pulls me up and slams me on the desk, pain shoots through my head.

"you're violence doesn't scare me Malfoy, you're still a coward" I sneer and kick him off me standing up again stumbling towards him in a sad attempt to march.

"you should be scared! you said it yourself I'm an evil death eater, you're stumbling over here acting all tough, but you're really just pathetic, a pathetic foolish girl who has no idea what she's talking about" the tears disappear and his anger takes over his face. What an

"asshole!"

"bitch!"

"death eater"

"freak!"
Theres a moment of silence both of us panting in rage a centimetre apart from each other, his eyes meeting mine both trying to figure out each others next move, his eyes are pained and glisten in reflection to my hair. He grabs my neck pulls me in and forces his lips onto mine , oddly I don't resist , instead I kiss back, passion and rage all turned into one, my hands hold onto his hair, his arms snaking around my waist pulling me in, it seems to last forever before we both take a step back to breathe, our heavy breathing filling the room.We stare at each other and embrace ourselves again this time he picks me up slamming me into the desk, his skin tingles against mine.How can something so wrong feel so right.I pull him in from his tie and he lets out a heavy sigh, almost surprised at my actions, filling me with excitement.His hands explore my body from head to hip, hovering around my waist squeezing me.I Grab his shirt holding onto his chest.Suddenly he stops and shoots himself back upright, he stares at me with anger, fear and pain. He storms out of the room.

What just happened? I vomit on the floor, it seems my body is as confused as my mind.