ღ chapter nineteen ღ

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louis pov

i couldn't possibly get him out of my head.

ever since i saw him at that party, his eyes were imprinted in my mind day-in and day-out. i never imagined ending up in the same university as him- yet i wasn't bothered by it either.

i had asked for a transfer from the university back home seeing as i wanted a job out here in the states and finishing school here would just make it easier.

but the fact that harry was starting george washington university this fall was something i completely forgot about.

it's not like i should even know.

harry and i aren't friends. at least, we haven't been since we were younger. we drifted apart. something that just happens i guess.

"is that all for today?" suddenly the cashier said beginning to ring up my items. i stare at the pack of haribos i had picked out and nod.

after the movie date (where my date just ended up abandoning me) and sticking with harry and his date (who seems to be too into-harry's ass for harry's own good), i decided to go to the candy store and get a pack of my favorite candies.

giving him the money i waited for him to give me back my receipt and thanked him before heading out. i opened the bag as soon as i got out of the store and munched on them on my way back to the hall i was situated in.

instant memories come flooding back from that one sleepover where i had promised harry i wouldn't be mean to him. that clearly didn't age well.

i didn't mean to be mean to him, but it was like i was hardwire to do it. words would just come out of me and i'd enjoy the look in his face.

but i knew he didn't like it. who would?

i sigh biting the heads off the bears first and it's when i come to a stop. from a far i spot harry's set of curls and the beanie he had been wearing earlier today and notice how he giggles to something his date has whispered in his ear.

my neck suddenly heats up and i grip the haribo bag. not being able to put a word to this feeling KILLED me but ever since i had walked into harry and his date this feeling had been crawling on me.

i couldn't exactly put my finger on it but when i noticed what my hand was doing i unclench my grip and released the bag from it's tight grip.

still staring at the two, i notice how harry was smiling ear to ear and nodding to whatever his date-mitchell?- was telling him.

mitchell seems to be smiling as well and i roll my eyes feeling the need for harry to be smiling at something i said. but i guess i get used to the fact that the only reaction i'll be getting from him is either an eye-roll or a hurt face by something i'll say.

i couldn't blame him though. i have always been a little mean to him. sometimes i don't even seem to notice when i am until i see harry's reaction to my words. i guess i've just gotten used to being mean to him.

i notice the pair suddenly start to walk and i grunt as i notice they're holding hands.

thinking it was probably i leave those two alone i decided to head to my dorm and just try to distract myself from whatever feelings i was having.

i never have had these feelings. why now? and why did they come just as soon as i saw harry once again?

a coincidence perhaps. yeah.

deciding on that, i grab my phone and decide to facetime one of my old friends i met back in high school. coincidentally, a friend that dated harry actually.

"tommo! how you been?" the perky english boy spoke as soon as he responded. i smiled, "ishmail! long time mate!"

"says the one who left to go to america," he replies rolling his eyes jokingly, "how's life over there?"

"it's alright, wanna know who i ran into?" i smirk knowing perfectly well how he felt about the green eyed boy.

"who?" he asked curiously.

"harry," i replied.

"styles?" he says, "i remember him saying he would study in the states, you went there because of him didn't you?"

"what-no!" i exclaimed, "i honestly didn't even know he'd be here!"

"mmh sure," he continued teasing, "i know for a fact you fancy him mate."

"i do not," i answered, "never have, never will. i would never fancy harry."

"now you're just being mean," he answers, "harry's great. i remember him being an excellent kisser, and he's kind really. a total sweetheart. you'd me a fool not to fancy him a little, lou."

"i've never have fancied him," i state bluntly, "i have been getting this weird feeling though. everytime i see him with his boyfriend there's this feeling where i just wanna-"

"jealousyyyyy," he interrupts singing, "you're jealous. he's dating someone and you're there watching him do it, you're jealous. it's normal."

"why would i be jealous?" i scoff, "i don't even like him."

"don't ask me," ishmail laughs, "but it seems like you are. i should know! i dated him a while and even i felt a tiny bit jealous when i'd see him talk to someone that wasn't me. it wasn't healthy so i guess that's why we ended things."

"but i'm not you," i answered, "i'd never fancied harry, you can tell by how i treat him anyway."

"sometimes we don't know how to express our emotions so we just express them the way you have been towards harry," he replies. what does he know?

is he some sort of therapist? seriously. he's been turning all of my words to the idea that i fancy harry when i don't. i don't fancy him.

why did i even call ishmail? now i have this weird thought in my head that maybe i fancied harry?

that's weird though.

"anyway," i finally spoke up and said, "how's school over there?"

-

a/n:

a short louis pov

soooo ishmail and louis are friends:>

and maybe just maybe louis recognized his new feelings? who knows.

sorry for the short chapter. i say this a lot omg.

using this to say:

GO WATCH 'JULIE AND THE PHANTOMS' on NETFLIX PLS MORE PPL NEED TO WATCH IT.

it's so underrated and it's so good!

unsaid emily bro:(
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september 23, 2020

unedited/unrevised

sarah

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