MUD - An LGBT+ Story

Flashback

Sinking slowly into my thoughts that sub conscious void wishing I could be anywhere else but here, home, classroom, anywhere else as I looked down as my feet sink into the mud. My mind started to process and criticise myself for the avoidable lunchtime detention "stupid idiot for forgetting to hand in my Maths homework, stupid!" Another thought tried to sooth my self-criticism "you had a lot on your mind, the homework had to be submitted on the same day as history field trip, so don't beat yourself up" it didn't help as my thoughts consumed me.

I had quickly eaten my lunch, which consisted of packed sandwiches, crisps and drink then proceeded to walk round to the detention room, it was on the other side of the school building from the canteen, therefore a bit of a walk. Arriving early, tentatively went in, an empty classroom has an eerie feel to it something that should be bustling with life, just empty. The tables were arranged in groups of four with the teachers desk at the front, there was a whiteboard on the wall and above this a clock, and as the room was quiet the tick of the second hand was loud and ominous, outside the window you could see the rest of the school kids enjoying their lunch break and I started to wish that this wasn't happening to me. My mind thought what if the teacher came in now and caught me gazing out of the window? It wouldn't be a good look so rushed to sit down at the most central table, at this point another boy walked in, my nerves jumped in exception of the door opening to the teacher, instead he sat opposite me on the same table. After a few moments of silence it felt like there would be just me and him taking part in this detention, I was too shy to ask the reason why he was here, the another boy was from my year maybe in a few other classes but I wasn't sure, honestly, this is the first time we even acknowledged each other, although there was something reassuring seeing a familiar face in an unusual situation. For him though I got the feeling this wasn't an unusual setting, "wow wasn't expecting to ever see you in detention, like ever! Whatcha do?, why?, how?" He said in an increasingly excited manner, a way which was overwhelming me, too many questions, the embarrassment of the situation is hard enough for me without the added pressure of making conversation, at least it shattered the silence "Just forgot to hand in homework" was my murmured response "ah right I didn't do the homework, well ya see that waste of space history field trip made me forget" I gave a slight smile as he continued, "this your first time then? I've been in loads of detentions don't worry you'll get use to them, I see you in classes and sports right, yeah think so? Before I could reply the teacher burst through the door in a hurried flamboyant manner "NOW!" She screech and with what seemed like a flick of a switch changed her personality to serious no nonsense approach and walked over the the teachers desk and sat down screeching the legs of the chair on the floor as she moved it to sit down. "You are both here for not handing in your Maths homework there is no excuse for forgetting!" She glanced at the clock "the time is exactly 12:30 you have 30 minutes starting now of sitting in silence and hopefully you will think why you're here!"

Sitting in silence for half and hour was easy for me, alone with my thoughts occasionally glancing over to the teacher who was hurriedly marking homework and from time to time shaking her head disapprovingly at the work she had just read. Once I felt myself glancing over to him, fidgeting in his seat, maybe he wasn't one of the bully types I categorised him as he seems okay and slightly awkwardly noticed me looking over and mouthed the words bored, I gave a slight smile as not to attract the attention of the teacher and looked away from him before starting to actually laugh and drew my attention over to the window thinking of the world outside and started to gaze out at nothing in particular. The eerie quiet of the classroom was broken as the teacher rose from her chair pushing it back in the same motion created an ear piercing noise as the legs scrapped across the floor again  "Okay half an hour has passed, end of detention" she went on to give a speech on how she didn't want to see either of us in detention again and the importance of handing in homework on time. He was all set to leave like a 100m sprinter at the beginning of a race and within a split second of the teacher saying we can go he jumped up grabbed his bag and hurried off saying "see ya around" in a move that was so quick I felt like my responses work in slow motion. It was an experience I had no intentions of returning, why would he say I'd get use to detentions though?

A loud whistle jolted me back to the present moment, feet sinking into the muddy playing field, dark clouds overhead and the weak attempts of something resembling a rugby match. The shouts of the other boys on the pitch amused me, some unrecognisable rugby terms as I moved just a little yet enough to unlock my feet from the mud and scanned my eyes across the pitch seeing a few of my close friends putting in a little more effort into it then me but could also tell they we suffering all the same. The loudmouth guys who think they are great yet nothing more than shouting for the sake of it were the obvious ones in the group, and then there was Him. Thinking about the detention made Him stand out a little more than usual, he was somewhere in-between quiet and noisy and no effort and putting in too much effort that its becoming embarrassing yet you could tell he wanted to fit in with the loudmouth group. After what felt like an eternity and with the greatest relief the PE teacher blew his whistle to signal the end of double sports for another week. Trudging back to the changing rooms we all gravitated to our friends groups banging our boots on the concrete as we went, apart from my boots everywhere else was mud free, top, shorts, legs which meant I could get changed in the quickest possible time! The school changing room was no place for dawdling the whole process was like a military procedure, focused, no looking around or glances, meanwhile others were shouting, making noise, messing about, as the steam from the showers started to engulf the changing room. Having changed I sat on the bench and looked down at my shoes and started to chat about homework for tomorrow with my friend wishing the bell to hurry up and ring. The last bell of the day is is such a satisfying moment knowing you are free for another day and it was time to leave, this was especially more rewarding today glad to have survived Monday with detention and double games, it couldn't get any worse.