Stay! By My Side

Chapter 26

Ai's POV

I went straight home and left Kudo behind. Tears are pouring down my cheeks uncontrollably now and I don't want him to see my face. I couldn't think straight and still afraid of any words he was about to say back there. After that night, I still can't get my mind focus on work. His voice when calling out my name, my real name, still linger clearly at the back of my head.

As much as I love that moment, I can't help but seeing her face. I couldn't bare the thought of seeing tears coming out from those eyes. As much as I love him, it wouldn't worth the scar I would crave on her heart.

Mouri Ran is a woman of dignity. She's loyal and kindhearted. She's willing to give her life in a very young age to a certain crazy head-to-toe overconfident detective. And the top of it, she's clean.

Dark organization sure will give you an experience worth your life, like literally. It's between a one way exit or  a dead end. You couldn't hold yourself back and you are not allowed of being uncertain, as much as you wouldn't allowed to have a life at all. Those dark view is far away from the gleaming Kudo Shinichi and his brilliant promising career.

Falling in love to those sparkling future is a mistake or should I say, more likely to be a sin. At the first night I escaped the organization, I only embrace the idea of getting out of those shitty life. I never intended to break into other person's life, let alone ruining their established relationship.

I just want to fall in love in peace, if you would call this as falling in love. I never understand the idea of loving  when all I got in my whole life was being torn apart. I got caught up in his spirit to turn down bad people, so caught up on those blinking eyes of him when he got the case right.

And then I started to lose my self. Forgot that this peaceful daily life was always just a ticking bomb. I started to lose grip on reality where I am actually a worthless traitor who should be grateful to have another exit.

Miyano Shiho is not supposed to be alive at all from that night. When the universe granted another life as Haibara Ai, I shouldn't be greedy. In this life, I should give myself another chance to be good.

Good. What is being good, exactly?

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Shinici's POV

She left her ice cream. I didn't dare to touch it until it loses its original shape. As much as I want to grab those wrist, the watery eyes of her somehow weakened my knees. She's about to cry.

On the top of that view, her words are repeating inside my head. I should not waver. But I already have. Even after three days, the vision of losing her in my grip is just something I couldn't bare at all. As soon as I saw her in my dream again the other night, I couldn't get myself back to sleep. I was so afraid of losing her without considering how she might feel about this. I was out of my mind.

I was out of my sight when I feel my phone vibrating inside my right pocket. I lazily take a look on it and didn't think that things could get worse until I saw Ran's name on the display.

"Shinichi?", She said my name from the other side of the line. I froze for a moment before I made sure which phone I was currently holding on.

It's Conan's.

"Ran-Nee chan? You dial a wrong number"

"Ah? Conan-kun? Is this really conan kun? But I thought I dial Shinichi's number"

"No, Ran-Neechan. This is mine."

"Sorry, Conan-kun. I must have been made a mistake. But anyway, are you really gonna ignore me right now? Geez, you didn't even pay any single visit anymore."